How to Enjoy Any Board Game with Kids in 35 Simple Steps

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When it comes to playing board games with children, the instructions might seem straightforward, but the reality can be a bit more complicated. Here’s a humorous take on the 35 steps I follow to navigate this adventure:

1. Agree to join the kids for game night.
2. Mediate a dispute over which game to play.
3. Reach a compromise: one round of each child’s game choice.
4. Break up yet another argument about whose game goes first, promising dessert if they can just stop bickering.
5. Discover that the first game’s pieces are missing.
6. Opt to start with the second game instead.
7. Realize that game two is also missing pieces, just not as many as the first.
8. Send the kids on a scavenger hunt for a substitute piece—like a penny.
9. Close your eyes and recharge your energy while waiting for their return; you’ll need it!
10. Once they’re back, let everyone choose their game pieces.
11. Intervene in the ensuing fight over who gets the penny.
12. Threaten to use the penny yourself if they can’t settle it.
13. Remind the kids how to play the game.
14. Take your turn, feeling hopeful.
15. Gently nudge the child whose turn it is now.
16. Provide another reminder on game rules.
17. Take another turn, trying to keep the rhythm.
18. Ask the child to remove the card from her mouth.
19. Take your turn yet again.
20. Remind the child that you’ve already explained the rules multiple times and that they were eager to play.
21. Hesitate before winning, knowing they might get upset if the game ends too quickly.
22. Play it cool and let them win, patting yourself on the back for being a “great” parent.
23. Realize that while you were being supportive, accusations of cheating are flying, and one child has launched her game piece across the room.
24. Exclaim, “This is why we can’t have nice things!” as you search for the lost piece.
25. Find a second penny to replace the missing piece.
26. Take a deep breath and ask the child to please take their turn, so you can wrap up this game.
27. Take yet another turn.
28. Call out the child’s name several times to get her attention for her turn.
29. She wins the game!
30. Agree to play another round for second and third places to keep the peace.
31. Allow the other child to win second place.
32. Pretend to be disappointed about coming in third.
33. Start humming the “Clean Up Song” while doing all the tidying up yourself.
34. Think you’ve dodged a bullet on board games for a bit until they remind you about the Great Compromise from earlier.
35. Start again from step 4.

This light-hearted take on family game night showcases the chaos and joy of playing board games with kids. If you’re interested in more parenting tips, check out this blog post. For those considering home insemination, this reputable site provides excellent kits for at-home use. Also, don’t forget to refer to this resource for valuable information on pregnancy and home insemination.

In summary, while playing board games with kids can be a challenging experience filled with bickering and missing pieces, it also creates opportunities for laughter and bonding. Embrace the chaos, and you might just find it to be one of the most rewarding parts of parenting.