Reflecting on my journey with my husband, it’s hard to believe we embarked on our adventure together as starry-eyed college students at just 19. Our first disagreement was memorable; he dramatically threw himself into a snowdrift, and I couldn’t help but burst into laughter, realizing in that moment just how much I adored him.
Fast forward twenty years, and we’ve weathered countless storms together. That’s quite a stretch of time! Through the years, we’ve endured our share of fiery arguments, complete with door slamming and the occasional shattered mirror. Yet, we’ve also shared moments filled with laughter that left us gasping for breath, tears streaming down our faces.
We’ve had days where we simply coexisted, communicating through groggy, pre-coffee grunts, and faced moments of helplessness—like the time we watched our youngest child repeatedly be sick after a nasty fall. We’ve shared those early morning glances that say, “Do we really have to do this all over again?”
Despite it all, I know he is my person—imperfect, a little bossy, undeniably brilliant, and prone to loud burps. But there are some things about our journey that took me by surprise when I first laid eyes on that goofy guy in a baseball cap, wielding a super soaker with a mischievous grin:
- One day, we’d master the art of communicating with just a glance. Did he just say that? Yes, he did! Should I take the iPad? Go for it! Are we scared? Absolutely.
- We would hurt each other with our words and actions, learning that marriage is about letting go of grudges.
- The human body is incredibly strange, yet even after witnessing things I wish I could unsee, we’d still desire to be intimate.
- There would be small, perfect moments, like sitting in silence for five minutes, or when I step out of the shower after two kids and he playfully says, “Wow, you look amazing.”
- There would come a day at the end of a busy summer with kids, when we drove away feeling so free, we briefly considered not looking back. But, of course, we did.
- We’d sometimes say hurtful, silly things just to push each other’s buttons, knowing exactly what would get under our skin.
- We would become the keepers of each other’s secrets. “Have You Ever” at our age is probably not the best idea!
- There would be mornings when the sound of him brushing his teeth would drive me to the brink, but I’d resist the urge to stab him with his own toothbrush.
- Saturday mornings would be a mixed bag—full of potential for relaxation or moments of miscommunication about bacon and life insurance.
- We’d learn it’s okay to not want to be around each other sometimes.
- Occasionally, we’d lose sight of each other amid the chaos of parenting.
- Ultimately, life would improve, or perhaps I simply stopped letting his kitchen leadership bother me so much.
A two-decade relationship endures countless trials. The real magic lies in waking up together after each storm, blinking at one another in the morning light, only to have one of us accidentally unleash a loud fart that startles our toddler awake, causing her to giggle. And that, my friends, is the essence of marriage.
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In summary, the journey of marriage over 20 years is filled with laughter, challenges, and growth. It’s a process of learning to appreciate the quirks and imperfections, ultimately deepening the bond that brings us closer together.
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