Making an appointment for a massage is a monumental task for me; it happens only about twice a year. Carving out time for myself proves to be quite a challenge. I often hold back, thinking I should only indulge in self-care when all the stars align: a stress-free period, completed projects, everything on track. I confine myself to those conditions, treating self-care as a reward for when life meets my expectations. Yet, I know that perfect circumstances are a myth; there’s always something nagging at me.
That stress manifests physically, and I believe we all have our particular spots where we harbor tension. My massage therapists may change, but they are always quick to locate “my knot”—the upper back, right shoulder—without fail. When they do, I can’t help but name it for them. “Oh, that’s just my ‘You Haven’t Finished That Report’ knot,” or my “You’re Not Doing Enough as a Parent” knot, or even my “You’ve Been Snacking Too Much” knot.
No matter what I call it, that knot is no friend of mine. Each massage therapist seems to adopt my knot as their mission to obliterate it. They must think, “Let’s conquer this enemy.” But can we ever truly escape that singular knot, that constant reminder of life’s stressors? I doubt it. When it gets worked on, there’s always pain—it’s like pressing down on a bruise or an open wound.
The moment arrives when the therapist says, “I’ll be right outside while you get dressed. Take your time.” Wouldn’t it be more honest if they said, “As you dress, don’t forget all those stressful thoughts you pushed aside for the last hour”? If I could just avoid letting that mental clutter rush back, that would be fantastic, but it never happens.
So, how do I confront these “knots” in life when a massage therapist isn’t readily available? Do I procrastinate to dodge them? Absolutely. Do I attempt to wish them away? Guilty again. Occasionally, I tackle some of my knots head-on before they spiral out of control, but not with the same fervor as a dedicated massage therapist.
Upon reflection, it’s not just massages that I sidestep, believing I must have everything in perfect order to indulge. I don’t read for pleasure, binge-watch a new series, or allow myself to unwind after the kids are finally asleep. This is a serious issue. Somewhere along the way, I learned that to grant myself kindness and love, I must have everything perfectly aligned. What a fallacy! Life is inherently chaotic, and stress is a constant companion.
I aspire to reach a mindset where I’m gentler with myself, tackling tasks with a sense of urgency and not being overly sensitive. Digging deeper, I can find some wise reminders I should acknowledge:
- The knots will always exist. Life isn’t simple or perfect, and wishing them away is futile.
- Acceptance means living gracefully with my knots. Some knots are permanent fixtures, and I must learn to set aside the tough stuff occasionally to make space for joy.
- And let’s face it, what could be more stress-relieving than doing something nice for myself? It seems so clear, right?
If a dedicated massage therapist is willing to fight my knots, perhaps I should extend that same kindness to myself—before they settle in my shoulders.
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In summary, prioritizing self-care amidst life’s chaos is essential. Recognizing that knots will always be there can help us navigate stress more gracefully, making time for activities that bring joy and relaxation.
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