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As I sat in my car, my legs tucked under the steering wheel, I struggled to hold onto a grocery bag I had hastily grabbed from the backseat. I had pulled over in an old gas station parking lot, overwhelmed with tears and unable to see clearly through my sobs. Just ten minutes into my journey home from a beach getaway with friends, I felt completely lost. I had cut my trip short by two days because I was feeling unwell. Living with chronic depression, I know what I need, and at that moment, what I needed was to be surrounded by my family, my dogs, and my own bed. So, I left.
Driving through unfamiliar yet beautiful scenery triggered an emotional release so powerful it felt almost primal. In that moment, I texted my therapist, requesting an urgent appointment. Then, I called my partner, Caleb. When he answered, all he could hear was my ragged breathing and muffled cries. After a brief silence, he asked, “What’s happening?” I told him I was on my way home and that I wasn’t okay.
“I don’t understand what you’re feeling,” he admitted, his honesty striking me.
Without thinking, I replied, “I don’t need you to understand; I just need you to talk to me about our everyday lives.”
As he shared mundane details about pressure washing the sidewalk and the state of the pool, I could visualize the dishes waiting to be done and the laundry piled high. With every word he spoke, the weight of my emotions began to lift. Soon, my breaths transformed from gasps of anguish to steady, calming inhales and exhales. I was starting to feel okay again, able to continue my drive home, where I would be met with warmth and a request for a new scooter from my youngest child.
When I was finally ready to discuss my feelings, Caleb approached me with genuine curiosity. How? Because the unknown is often easier to explore.
When I became a parent, I feared the unknown concerning my children’s experiences. I was comfortable with not knowing practical things like how to operate a breast pump—those issues could be resolved with a quick online search. But the prospect of not understanding significant life experiences terrified me, especially as my kids grew into their own identities, particularly when they became middle-schoolers.
As a child, I didn’t engage in reckless behavior. I wasn’t one to experiment with alcohol or drugs, nor did I ever find myself in trouble with the law. My teenage years were marked by an innocent belief in my intelligence, often thinking I was smarter than my parents.
I worried that my lack of experience with typical adolescent antics would hinder my ability to guide my kids through their challenges. However, it turns out that the beauty of motherhood lies in those moments spent on the couch with a child who asks if you’ve ever been in a situation they describe. When you can say, “No, and I want to hear about it,” they open up. They sense your genuine interest, which builds trust. When they come to you feeling guilty or stressed, they’ll remember that you’re there to understand, not to judge.
In times when someone needs you to fix a situation—like cleaning up after a pet mishap before a social worker arrives—having the know-how is crucial. But remember, parenting is not just about handling the little messes; it’s about the bigger emotional challenges.
When your loved ones seek you out for guidance during tough times, not fully understanding their situation can actually strengthen your connection. It allows for authentic, open conversations instead of rushed advice. Not knowing can drive you to ask deeper questions, fostering a genuine curiosity that brings you closer. Sometimes, knowledge can be a crutch, a shortcut to avoid true connection. If love means paying attention, then embracing the unknown can be a powerful step toward that goal.
Not knowing doesn’t equate to not caring. Embrace it; cherish it as a unique gift for both you and your loved ones.
For further insights, check out our article on home insemination techniques, and for a comprehensive guide on the topic, visit Make A Mom’s at-home insemination kit. For excellent resources related to pregnancy, explore Healthline’s pregnancy guide.
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In summary, while empathy is often championed, sometimes the lack of understanding can lead to deeper connections and more meaningful conversations. Embracing the unknown can transform relationships and create a supportive environment for those you love.