Middle school: a tumultuous time filled with insecurities, drama, and the chaos of adolescence. Back in sixth grade, I thought my middle school experience was pure torture. The food was terrible, and the bathrooms were often unpleasant. However, looking back now as a high school junior, I see that those middle school years were actually the least stressful period of my life.
At 16 years old, I’ve spent much of this school year at home, turning my bedroom into more of a classroom than a sanctuary. While it has been monotonous at times, I’ve reconnected with my middle school friends through social media. Our conversations often revolve around trivial debates, like whether orange juice or apple juice is superior (for the record, orange juice is clearly the best). These chats remind me of how naive I was during those years we spent together.
In sixth grade, my brother was a freshman at a prestigious high school that accepts only a small fraction of applicants. I yearned to follow in his footsteps, not for the right reasons, but to impress my family and peers. Throughout middle school, I boasted the highest GPA in my class. I think my good behavior and rapport with teachers played a big part in my academic success. I even received a special award from my PE teacher, despite not being a particularly athletic student.
Over time, my grades turned me into someone a bit arrogant. Each report card displayed my ranking among my peers, and while I fluctuated between first and second place, I ultimately became the valedictorian. This achievement inflated my ego, setting me up for a harsh reality check in high school.
Upon entering high school, I encountered a straightforward engineering teacher who bluntly told us that we were no longer unique. Everyone in the room had stellar middle school records, so there was no one who stood out. I wish someone had told me that my self-worth shouldn’t be tied to my grades, as I often exaggerated my intelligence without fully grasping how much I still had to learn.
I also regret not pursuing activities that truly brought me joy. I spent so much time trying to uphold a “smart” image that I missed out on genuine experiences. For example, I joined the LEGO robotics team, even though I had little understanding of either building with LEGOs or the coding involved.
Now, as I face challenges in high school and receive grades that aren’t as high as I’d like, I’ve struggled with my self-esteem. While I appreciate the opportunities I’ve been given and am adjusting to high school life, I can’t help but feel that my focus on academic success created a divide between me, my friendships, and my happiness. Achieving valedictorian came with sacrifices, and I sometimes wonder if those sacrifices were worth it in the grand scheme of things.
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In summary, my experience as a middle school valedictorian has taught me valuable lessons about self-worth, the importance of pursuing genuine interests, and the need to balance academics with personal happiness.