Dear friends,
I need to address something that’s been weighing on my mind. When your partner is working late, out of town, under the weather, or otherwise temporarily unavailable, you are not “Single Momming It.” I understand that you may not mean any harm, but it’s simply not accurate. So, what does “Single Momming” really entail?
For the majority of my days, including sleepless nights, early mornings, potty training, meal prep, playdates, soccer practice, dentist visits, and all the chaos in between, I am the sole caregiver. Yes, I enjoy the joyful moments too, but here’s the reality—I am the only one responsible for building my child’s future. I manage the college fund, pay all the bills, and keep track of everything that affects my child’s development, happiness, and well-being, every single day of the year.
While I appreciate my boyfriend’s support and affection towards my child, the day-to-day responsibilities fall on my shoulders alone. I juggle full-time work while caring for my son, and when he’s asleep, I often find myself working late into the night to secure our future. I am the one who ensures there’s always food on the table and that my child has everything he needs, from school supplies to sports gear.
Every night as I drift to sleep, I wonder if I’m doing enough. Did I give him enough attention today? Am I providing him with the love and support he deserves? There’s no partner beside me to share a laugh about the adorable things he says, or to reassure me that I’m doing okay. There’s no one to remind me every morning that today is a fresh start.
When I take time for myself—whether it’s a haircut, a dinner out, or a doctor’s appointment—I often have to find and pay for a sitter, which can be a challenge. So please, I ask you to reconsider comparing your temporary struggles with mine. I empathize with your exhaustion and understand that even the most devoted partners can falter. I get it—being the default parent can be taxing.
But your extra workload is fleeting, while mine feels like an endless journey. I never chose this path; I always envisioned raising my child with two loving parents. Life had other plans, and while I’m not seeking pity, I do want to express that we all have our own battles.
My love for my child is immense, and I am grateful for him every single day. I face each challenge because he deserves every bit of my effort. This is our reality, and I navigate it with a smile, even on the toughest days. All I ask is that you recognize the distinction between our experiences. We are all incredible mothers, and we each have our moments of triumph and exhaustion.
So, let’s reserve the term “Single Momming It” for those of us who truly are. For further reading, you might find this piece on single parenting insightful. For anyone considering at-home insemination, check out this reliable retailer for syringes. And for more information on pregnancy and insemination, this podcast is a fantastic resource.
In summary, let’s be mindful of the language we use and the experiences we share. While every parent faces their own set of challenges, the journey of a single mom is a unique and ongoing commitment.
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