By: Ava Thompson
Updated: Aug. 21, 2023
Originally Published: Aug. 17, 2023
Today marked the beginning of 2nd grade for my eldest son, Leo. I woke up bright and early at 5:30 a.m., an hour before my alarm, filled with excitement, much like the anticipation of Christmas morning.
I went through all the rituals that every mother should embrace on such a significant day. I lovingly whipped up pancakes from a quick-mix bottle that simply requires water and a vigorous shake. I made sure I was dressed appropriately, just in case my neighbors caught a glimpse of my pancake-making antics.
I laid out Leo’s navy blue uniform shorts, instructing him to overlook the lint that had somehow found its way onto them—washing them with new towels had been an unfortunate mistake. I also ensured that his sneakers were double-knotted and ready for action.
In our rush, we missed the bus, but I reassured him that the carpool line would be quick. I gathered my other sleepy children and loaded them into our trusty old minivan.
For months, Leo has been declaring his ambition to become an “asteroidal physicist.” Just last year, he simply wanted to be a scientist. I’m not sure what prompted the change, but I certainly found myself Googling “asteroidal physicist” before my morning coffee—what a way to start the day!
As we approached the school, I decided to have a heartfelt moment with Leo. You know the kind I mean—when you connect on a deeper level, and for just a fleeting second, your child comprehensively understands your love, and you savor the feeling of parenting success. But then, reality hits, and you find yourself shouting, “DON’T EAT THE TOOTHPASTE OUT OF THE BATHROOM SINK!” for the umpteenth time.
I turned in my seat, fighting back tears, and said, “Leo, I’m so proud of you. I hope you have an amazing day. Your siblings are really going to miss you today—”
But just then, the teacher on carpool duty swung open our van door, and Leo yelled, “BYE, SUCKERS!!!!!” at the top of his lungs while leaping out. The teacher froze for a moment, taken aback. I forced a smile and shouted, “HAVE A GREAT DAY!” as if this was a perfectly normal family tradition. Her expression remained unchanged as she closed the door.
I’ve contemplated my next drop-off strategy. Perhaps I’ll embrace this chaotic moment and, during the next goodbye, roll down the window of our aging van and shout “BYE, SUCKERS!!!!” while speeding off. Because, at the end of the day, this is how we roll—suckers.
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In summary, the first day of school can be filled with unexpected moments of embarrassment, but they often turn into cherished memories. Embrace the chaos and remember that these experiences are what make parenting truly unique.
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