13 Effective Strategies for Parenting Your Tweens (That Also Worked with Your Toddlers)

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The blissful phase of parenting takes a wild turn when your child reaches the tween stage. It’s a loud, chaotic, and sometimes tumultuous time—welcome to the whirlwind of the tween years! Tweens bear a striking resemblance to larger toddlers, and for good reason: both age groups experience significant emotional, physical, and mental growth. They’re discovering their identities, testing boundaries, and picking up new skills.

Fortunately, you already possess the tools to navigate this new chapter. With a few tweaks, the parenting strategies that worked wonders for your toddlers can also be applied to your tweens:

  1. Keep Snacks on Hand: This advice might be the most crucial. Tweens require extra calories to fuel their growing bodies. While the snacks may differ from their toddler days, it’s vital to keep them well-fed. Expect to encounter a trail of chip bags, sticky cups, and food remnants throughout your home; it’s a small price to pay for a content tween.
  2. Respect Their Space: Tweens need time alone. Use this opportunity to enjoy a moment of peace for yourself. Check in occasionally but be sure to give them the space they crave.
  3. Prioritize Sleep: Ensuring your tweens get enough rest is essential. It doesn’t matter where they doze off—be it the car, couch or even the floor. Just let them sleep. Those drool stains on the cushions? Totally worth it!
  4. Offer Choices: Give them the illusion of control with options like, “Would you prefer to do the dishes or the laundry?” This strategy works like a charm—most of the time.
  5. Utilize Incentives: Feel free to call them “incentives” if that makes you feel better. The bribes may become pricier as they grow, but they are an excellent way to encourage positive behavior. No need to feel guilty about it!
  6. Acknowledge Their Hormonal Turmoil: During these years, tweens are hit with a surge of hormones. Their behavior can be unpredictable, and you might not always understand it. Just provide them with a safe space to express themselves—even if it gets a little messy.
  7. Establish Clear Boundaries: Set firm rules and make sure your tween understands them. You need to be vocal about your expectations and stand your ground.
  8. Ignore the Tantrums: When they unleash the “I HATE YOU!” tactic, resist the urge to engage. Walk away and allow both of you to cool down before revisiting the conversation.
  9. Offer Praise: Celebrate their achievements, no matter how small. Express your pride in their endeavors, whether it’s sports, academics, or hobbies. Boosting their self-esteem is crucial for those times when you need to reel them back in.
  10. Identify Their Triggers: Discover what matters most to them and use it as leverage for behavior management. Taking away their Wi-Fi privileges can work like magic!
  11. Mind Your Words: Remember, your tweens are always listening, and they will mimic your behavior. While it might have been amusing when your toddler dropped a curse word, it’s less funny when your tween faces consequences for the same.
  12. Keep an Eye on Them: Just as you once monitored your toddler from eating crayons, now you must safeguard your tween from more significant dangers. Stay vigilant and keep them close.
  13. Express Your Love: Let them know you love them, even if they roll their eyes. They may seem indifferent, but hearing those words daily is essential.

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In summary, parenting tweens can be challenging, but many strategies you used with toddlers can be adapted to fit their evolving needs. By staying patient, nurturing their independence, and maintaining open communication, you can successfully navigate this exciting yet tumultuous stage of development.


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