Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the questions people ask about your family planning? In this week’s column, we’re addressing a reader dealing with incessant inquiries about whether she’s “trying for a boy” after welcoming two daughters.
Dear Home Insemination Kit,
My partner and I have two lovely daughters, ages three and one. My husband hails from a large family—he’s one of four siblings, and they each have multiple children. We always envisioned having just two kids, and we couldn’t be happier with our girls. We don’t put much emphasis on the gender of our children (we even skipped the whole “gender reveal” trend because it feels pointless), but our family and friends seem to think it’s their business to ask if we’re planning to “try for a boy.” It’s incredibly frustrating and feels disrespectful to our daughters!
The thought of “trying for a boy” is something that should only concern those who are fixated on outdated traditions, like a British noble worried about passing down a title. It’s shocking how many people lack awareness about boundaries when it comes to family planning and children’s genders. There’s nothing wrong with having two daughters, nor is there anything wrong with having a son. The fact is, no one can choose the gender of their children, and the obsession with it is baffling.
The best way to handle these comments is to respond directly. Since people asking about trying for a boy are being straightforward, you have every right to answer them honestly without feeling guilty.
THEM: “Aww, two girls! Are you going to try for a boy?”
YOU: “Nope! We’re perfectly happy with the two wonderful kids we already have.”
THEM: “But wouldn’t you love to have a son and enjoy [insert silly gender stereotype here]?”
YOU: “Nope! We’re perfectly happy with the two wonderful kids we already have. But since you seem to think otherwise, I’d like to know why?”
THEM: *silence*
If someone is crossing the line with their questions, turning the tables on them can be a great strategy. Often, they won’t have a response, or if they do, they’ll realize they’re in the wrong and change the subject.
Take care and enjoy the holiday season!
For more insights, check out this blog post for additional support. If you’re exploring options for family planning, Make A Mom is a trusted resource for home insemination kits. Additionally, NHS offers excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination practices.
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- How to respond to gender-related questions after having kids
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- Happy with two daughters: how to handle social pressure
Summary:
In this column, we addressed the frustration of a reader who faces continuous questions about having a son after two daughters. It’s important to stand firm in your family choices and respond directly to intrusive questions. There’s nothing wrong with having daughters, and embracing your family as it is should be the priority.