As summer draws near, I find myself reflecting on the unique challenges that come with being a Black mom, especially with a teenage son. Like every summer before, I approach this season with trepidation. The ongoing pandemic adds another layer of complexity to my concerns. With the tragic murder of George Floyd and the subsequent unrest across our nation, my worries for my children and yours have intensified.
As a mother, I share the same hopes for my son that I believe all mothers have for their children: I want him to forge unforgettable memories, enjoy his childhood, make new friends, learn, take on responsibilities, and mature. Ultimately, I want him to thrive, to pursue his dreams without fear. Yet, I can’t help but wonder if my white mom friends share similar fears — fears about their sons reaching 9th grade or beyond.
The heartbreaking video captured by a courageous young girl living through a nightmare reminds us how precious life is and how easily it can be taken. So, what can we as moms learn from the tragic events surrounding George Floyd’s murder?
Just as the pandemic has brought us together in our shared struggle for survival, we must unite against the pervasive racism that threatens our communities. We should all carry a sense of urgency and outrage over the senseless violence perpetrated against Black individuals. This is not a problem for the next generation to tackle; it’s one we must confront now.
As moms, we often discuss our challenges in parenting groups and on social media. Let’s channel that same energy to uplift Black mothers. Attend rallies, participate in workshops to examine your biases, and learn about the history of racism in the United States. And don’t forget to involve your children in these activities.
Imagine if your dreams for your child were suddenly crushed by the actions of a police officer who wrongfully suspected them. What if your son was killed, lying lifeless on the street? How would you feel? Do you worry about your child’s safety when they go outside to play?
Take a moment to sit with those feelings. Does it make you uncomfortable? It should. I have mourned for mothers I don’t know: for George’s mother, Breonna’s mother, Trayvon’s mother, and countless others. We cannot wait for the next tragedy to ask, “How can I help?”
As a Black woman and mother, I feel compelled to support white moms by providing them with the tools to become more aware and effective allies, not just for me, but for all of our children. Statistically, Black individuals face a higher risk of death at the hands of law enforcement — a stark truth we must confront.
Now is the time to act and not wait until the next tragedy strikes. Several years ago, I attended a workshop called Undoing Racism, which helped me bond with fellow attendees while confronting our biases. It sparked meaningful conversations about race that we desperately need now.
Start by understanding your core values. Just because you grew up in a diverse community or have friends from different backgrounds doesn’t mean you’re immune to being complicit in everyday racism. The first step in being an ally is educating yourself. The workshops and seminars you attend will empower your children to stand up for their Black peers when needed.
Be willing to be uncomfortable. Speak out against police brutality and racism when you see it, even if you’re the only one doing so. Your children are watching your actions. Teach them to use their voices to challenge injustice.
Utilize your privilege as a white mom to advocate for change. This battle is not just for one group; it’s a collective fight for humanity. Together, we can drive our society forward.
From one mom to another, let’s commit to listening, learning, and growing together. We can be a source of support for those affected by violence and injustice.
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In summary, as mothers, we have a responsibility to foster understanding and allyship in our communities. By confronting our biases, educating ourselves, and supporting one another, we can create a safer and more equitable world for all children.