This article is part of our three-part series, “Heading to College,” designed to help parents prepare their teens for this significant life transition. In our previous posts, we discussed essential conversations to have with incoming freshmen and explored strategies for a successful first year at college. Last month, we tackled the ins and outs of dorm shopping and shared tips for budgeting effectively.
Now, as August rolls in, we focus on the logistics of moving in and the emotional journey that comes with it. It’s a month filled with mixed emotions, where pride and sadness intertwine.
When our little ones arrived nearly two decades ago, they turned our lives upside down. This transition is just as monumental, so be kind to yourself; it’s going to take time to adjust. The first big change hit hard, so it’s no surprise that this one carries its weight, too.
As August progresses, the clock ticks louder. It began with months, then weeks, and now just days until my son embarks on this new chapter. I reminded myself: you can feel the pain now or later, but either way, it’s coming. In a conversation with a friend, I admitted I was in denial about his departure. Worrying did me no good and only added stress to him; I chose to keep my focus on the present and leave the heavy emotions for later.
Here are three essential steps to help you navigate move-in day and the subsequent separation:
1. Organize Move-In Day
Check the university’s website for the move-in schedule and any parent or student programming. Attending orientation, even if just for a short time, can help you feel connected to your child’s new environment. While you’re at it, look up the dates for parents’ weekend and consider booking accommodations early, especially if your teen is attending school in a busy city.
Some families opt to arrive a day or two before move-in to familiarize themselves with their child’s new surroundings, while others prefer to arrive just before the big day. Personally, I favored a quick approach: unpack my child and leave swiftly. Lingering felt uncomfortable, as if I were intruding on their new journey.
On move-in day, consider visiting the health center to have your child sign a release form allowing medical professionals to communicate with you in case of emergencies. It’s a small step, but one that could save you stress later.
2. Prepare for the Goodbye
The moment you finish making your child’s bed, you’ll likely feel somewhat unnecessary. After attending the welcome speeches and meeting your child’s roommate’s parents, you’ll find yourself at a pivotal moment: it’s time to say goodbye.
Colleges often schedule a goodbye moment, and ignoring it can lead to awkwardness. As your child turns their focus toward new friends and orientation activities, it’s crucial to plan your farewell. Some parents choose to have dinner or breakfast with their freshman before parting ways. Think of it as removing a Band-Aid—do it quickly and avoid looking back.
Most colleges understand that parents can become emotional and will encourage you to leave after the goodbye moment. While many parents admit to shedding tears on the drive home, it’s best to keep it together while still on campus. Remember, your child is navigating a whirlwind of emotions and doesn’t need the added worry of your feelings.
The wise words of Dr. Sarah James, a psychologist with decades of experience, resonate well here: “This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment. Take the time to share meaningful thoughts with your child as they step into this new chapter.” Reflect on what you want your child to carry with them—life lessons and heartfelt advice, rather than mundane reminders like “Always make your bed.”
So, plan your move-in day, say goodbye at the designated time, leave behind a letter filled with encouragement for the months to come, and then walk away.
3. Establish Communication
To stay in the loop about campus happenings, consider subscribing to the university’s daily newsletter or checking their website for important dates related to parents’ weekend, exams, and breaks. Parents’ associations can also offer a glimpse into campus life without overstepping boundaries.
While traditional advice suggests letting your child reach out when they’re ready, checking in more frequently at the start can be beneficial. Freshmen often experience homesickness, and a simple text or call can reassure them that they’re not alone.
This period is a learning curve for both of you in terms of communication. As mental health issues on college campuses rise, staying connected is crucial. Remember those days at the park when your child would run over to you for reassurance? College is a similar experience, only this time, both you and your child are learning to navigate new levels of independence.
In conclusion, moving your child into college is both a practical and emotional journey. By planning ahead, preparing for farewells, and establishing open lines of communication, you can navigate this transition with grace. For further insights on preparing for this life change, check out one of our other blog posts here. And if you’re looking for essential supplies for at-home insemination, consider exploring reputable retailers like Make a Mom who offer great kits to support your journey. For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, visit this resource.
Summary
As your child heads off to college, it’s vital to prepare for the move and the emotional shift that accompanies it. This guide provides practical steps for organizing move-in day, planning farewells, and establishing communication, ensuring a smoother transition for both you and your child.
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