Navigating the emotional landscape of divorce can be incredibly taxing, but remaining in an unfulfilling marriage is equally challenging. Choosing to initiate a divorce is a significant decision, marking just the beginning of a potentially lengthy journey. If you’re contemplating divorce but feel uncertain about how to proceed, you’re not alone; this topic garners nearly 1,900 searches monthly. Before consulting a divorce attorney or discussing your situation with friends and family, take the time to reflect on your ideal post-divorce scenario. Consider how you wish to split your assets, manage child custody if applicable, and even what will happen to any shared pets. Having a clear vision of your desired outcome will facilitate communication with your lawyer and your spouse.
Once you’ve made the decision to divorce, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed about the next steps. Start by arming yourself with a divorce checklist and gather any necessary documentation you might need to launch the proceedings. Here are some tips to help streamline the process:
Begin Saving Money
Transitioning from shared finances to managing expenses independently can be daunting. Therefore, it’s wise to start saving as soon as you know divorce is on the horizon. Consider opening a personal bank account if you don’t have one already. As financial expert Lucy Grayson notes, “Any income you earn during your marriage is considered marital property and will be divided between you and your spouse.” Having a separate account can prevent your spouse from accessing funds before asset division occurs.
Get Organized and Document Everything
Begin compiling essential paperwork, including financial statements, property deeds, and a monthly budget for expenses related to any children. A comprehensive divorce checklist can guide you through this process. “Start documenting your family finances, including both your income and your spouse’s,” advises Grayson. Maintain records of credit card statements, bank statements, tax returns, receipts, and bills. If you have children, keep track of their activities and note who handles responsibilities like driving them to sports or social events.
Here are some crucial documents to prepare for your filing:
- Income tax returns
- Employment records
- Financial records (bank statements)
- Investment account statements
- Pension plan details
- Retirement accounts
- Children’s bank accounts
- Debt documents
- Wills and trust agreements
- Social Security statements
- Credit reports
- Monthly budget worksheet
Take Responsibility
Divorce can feel overwhelming; however, it’s crucial to actively engage in the process to protect your interests. “Being proactive, even as the non-initiator, will lead to a better settlement and a more efficient, less stressful, and less costly divorce,” says divorce coach Tara Finn.
Build a Support System
Divorce can be isolating, making it vital to have a solid support network. Whether it’s friends, family, or community organizations, support is available. “Utilize resources that help you navigate the rollercoaster of emotions during this time,” Finn suggests. Controlling your emotions will better prepare you for negotiations and help you remain level-headed.
Find a Divorce Mediator or Attorney
Not every divorce requires a contentious court battle; mediation may be an option if both spouses are in agreement. However, for most cases, hiring a divorce attorney is necessary. This may involve meeting several lawyers to find one who aligns with your specific needs.
Does Infidelity Impact Property Division?
In general, judges do not factor in marital infidelity when dividing property. Nonetheless, it’s wise to document any instances of cheating, as state laws vary, and it may not affect child custody arrangements unless the child’s safety is compromised.
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In summary, preparing for a divorce involves mental and emotional readiness, financial planning, documentation, personal responsibility, and seeking support. This process may seem daunting, but taking organized steps can help simplify the journey ahead.