Last week, as I was hurrying to a dinner with friends I hadn’t seen in ages, I encountered an unexpected toll booth. For those who live in areas without such inconveniences, let me explain: you must halt in the middle of the highway, hand over some cash, and hope you have enough to continue your journey. In my area, these booths pop up frequently, and if you find yourself short on cash, everyone behind you is quick to express their frustration while you scramble to fill out a form promising to pay later.
This has happened to me more than once, and it’s always a deeply embarrassing experience. I can feel the sweat forming, and I worry about the drivers stuck behind me. Meanwhile, they’re honking and hurling insults, making a tough situation even worse.
Of course, no one ever sets out to be that infuriating driver. We don’t hit the road thinking, “Today, I’ll annoy everyone and delay their plans!” But it’s easy to forget what it’s like to be on the receiving end of someone else’s misfortune. And by “we,” I mean “me.”
As I sat there, frustrated with the car in front of me that was taking ages to pay their toll, my impatience turned into anger. I began banging my hands on the steering wheel and leaning my head back in exasperation, inching closer to their bumper as if that would somehow speed things up. Spoiler alert: it didn’t, and it only made me angrier (and hungrier).
Then, I glanced in my rearview mirror and saw not a line of irritated cars, but my own reflection—a frustrated, ungrateful woman deep in the throes of impatience. I hated what I saw. Here I was, acting like a jerk simply because I was prioritizing my desire to arrive on time over a little bit of empathy and understanding. I didn’t even consider what the driver in front of me might be experiencing—something I strive to teach my children.
In that moment, I remembered my own panic during similar situations. I recalled the embarrassment, the sweating, and the pressure of having cars piled behind me, impatiently waiting for me to find my toll money. I thought about how life is already challenging for so many, and I pride myself on being considerate of others. Yet there I was, ready to unleash my frustration on someone else who was likely struggling just like I had.
I realized that the lovely dinner waiting for me wouldn’t just walk away. I have great friends who would understand if I were late. I began to wonder if the driver in front of me was a new driver, perhaps like my teenage son. Maybe they were simply having a rough day or couldn’t afford the toll.
In a flash, memories of my son’s temper tantrums flooded back, specifically the time he scattered my carefully saved quarters around the car. I had to scramble to gather them while impatient drivers honked, expecting me to magically make things happen faster.
I took a deep breath and felt a wave of shame wash over me as I realized how rude I had been, creeping too close and losing my cool.
When the car finally moved, I reached the toll booth, and the attendant informed me that the kind driver in front had paid my toll due to the delay. My first thought was one of embarrassment—I had been so caught up in my own frustration that I had become a miserable person.
Determined to remedy my behavior, I decided to pay for the vehicle behind me. It was a much-needed reminder to be patient and compassionate, especially in moments when I feel my life is more important than anyone else’s—because it’s not.
I’ll take a moment to breathe, recall times I’ve struggled, and treat others with the kindness I would hope for during my tough moments. This experience highlighted that I can sometimes be inconsiderate, and it’s something I need to work on—especially when hunger strikes.
So if you notice me acting like an impatient jerk, please feel free to remind me to check myself.
For more insights on this topic, you can check out another blog post here. If you’re looking for guidance on home insemination, visit Make a Mom, an authority in this area. Additionally, ASRM provides excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, I learned a valuable lesson about patience and empathy during that frustrating toll booth experience, reminding me to be more considerate of others.