The holiday season is my favorite time of year. I dive into Christmas tunes as early as November, and I can’t resist putting up decorations before Thanksgiving. Admittedly, some of those decorations might linger right through the year, but that’s more due to my procrastination than anything else.
However, there’s one aspect of the holidays that doesn’t sit well with me – the overwhelming number of gifts. Before you label me a grinch, let me explain. I do enjoy gifts, both giving and receiving, but I’m not a fan of the excess. Like a modern-day Robin Hood, I prefer a more modest, eco-conscious holiday.
This year, we’re opting for fewer presents under the tree. This shift has been gradual over the past few years, following those moments of clarity after holidays where it felt like we’d received enough gifts to fill an entire warehouse.
In truth, my family has always embraced an extravagant Christmas. It wasn’t just my immediate relatives; presents poured in from grandparents, aunts, uncles, and even distant cousins. When my children were little, there were years when we struggled to fit all the gifts in our van. It felt like a colossal task to unpack everything, often taking weeks to find homes for it all.
This created a sense of anxiety leading up to the holidays, which was quickly followed by a post-holiday slump. Nothing dampens the festive spirit quite like clutter, the stress of credit card bills, and the guilt associated with rampant consumerism.
At heart, I lean towards minimalism. Clutter causes me serious anxiety. Just glancing at a chaotic scene makes my chest tighten. More stuff translates into less joy for me. Over the years, we’ve experimented with various strategies to tame our holiday frenzy into something more manageable and aligned with our values. Some of these strategies worked well, while others didn’t.
For instance, we found success with a “not-so-secret Santa” gift exchange among siblings that involves small presents and a donation to a charity meaningful to the recipient. However, the idea of eliminating gifts altogether didn’t resonate with our family, as loved ones enjoy the act of giving. Watching children unwrap gifts brings joy, and it’s a way to express thoughtfulness. I can’t even bring myself to skip gifts for aunts and uncles; giving a small token is gratifying for everyone involved.
That said, we can still move away from the overwhelming nature of traditional gift-giving by embracing a lighter approach to the holidays. This doesn’t mean fewer gifts alone; it means prioritizing experiences over material items.
I advocate for gifting experiences—such as museum memberships, family getaways, or cooking classes—because they help reduce post-holiday clutter. Research even supports this idea, showing that experiences foster gratitude. According to researchers at Cornell University, we tend to feel more thankful for what we’ve experienced rather than what we possess, and that gratitude promotes generosity towards others.
Moreover, experiences can enhance children’s intelligence. A study from Oxford University revealed that the academic success of young children is more closely connected to their home environment and quality interactions with parents than to toys or gadgets. So while the allure of a shiny new toy is strong, our children benefit far more from our time and attention.
Excess toys and gadgets can leave us feeling overwhelmed, which contradicts the happiness we hope to achieve through gift-giving. I remember the stress of having to find a place for a carload of stuff after the holidays. Experts suggest that experiences are generally more satisfying because they are unique and deeply personal. As Joseph Goodman, an associate professor at Washington University, notes, “Experiences are great because they lead to happiness; they’re less comparable than material goods.”
Additionally, focusing on experiences is beneficial for the environment, as we reduce the demand for yet another plastic toy.
This year, we’re continuing our trend of valuing experiences over possessions, and it seems our extended family is on board too. Instead of a heap of electronics and toys, we’ll be gifting camp registrations, planning a family trip, and sharing tickets to a sporting event. We’ll also make donations in each other’s names, focusing on causes that resonate with us. Planning to do activities together—not just talking about them—will be our priority.
So yes, there may be fewer packages under the tree this Christmas morning, but the gifts we do have will be far more meaningful.
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In summary, embracing fewer gifts and focusing on experiences can lead to a more fulfilling holiday season, emphasizing gratitude, connection, and environmental consciousness.