Updated: November 27, 2019
Originally Published: November 27, 2019
For a long time, I was convinced that I possessed a talent for killing houseplants. Any green life that entered my home seemed to meet an untimely demise, neglected and forgotten amidst the chaos of life. But a few months ago, on a whim, I decided to change that. While browsing the garden section of a local home improvement store to distract myself from a particularly tough day, I found myself drawn to the vibrant greenery. I couldn’t resist bringing a few plants home to my new space.
What Does “Home” Mean?
It’s more than just a physical location; it often represents a state of mind. My vision of home, especially after separating from my spouse, was still taking shape. The house I had recently moved into felt right from the moment I stepped inside—it was welcoming and filled with potential. An older cinder block ranch with ample space, it exuded the kind of energy that made me feel at ease. But it was also new territory for me.
My new place is conveniently located just ten minutes away from the home I had shared with my ex-husband, a house we had built and decorated together as a complete family unit. It’s a beautiful home, minimalist and modern, and sometimes, memories of it would flicker through my mind when I thought about “home.” It remains my children’s other residence, and leaving that picture-perfect space was challenging. Though I knew it was essential for my well-being, I still carried the weight of being the catalyst for our family’s division.
In that garden section, I wasn’t consciously pondering these emotions. Instead, I thought, “Imagine how lovely my sunroom would look filled with lush plants.”
Finding Joy in Solitude
For any divorced parent, those days when children are away can feel starkly empty. On my days off, the silence was palpable—no meals to prepare, no bedtime stories, and no homework to check. While solitary moments can be refreshing, I would always choose to have my kids around. My new plants quickly revealed that I needed a source of joy and a distraction during those times when I couldn’t pour my love into my children.
Once I brought my impulsive plant purchases home, I placed them on the beige tiles of my sunroom, uncertain of my next steps. Would three walls of north-facing windows provide enough light? Would I end up killing these plants too? Despite my past failures, I ventured to thrift stores for pots, completely clueless about what I was doing. Some pots didn’t have drainage holes, and I found myself worrying if that would lead to disaster. So far, they seemed to be thriving.
A Therapeutic Ritual
As I accumulated more plants and pots, I realized that tending to them was more than just a way to fill my time or satisfy a nurturing instinct. Caring for these green companions became a therapeutic ritual. Each evening, as I watered them, I could feel the stress of the day melting away. Most of my plants reside on the sun porch, where I often find myself working on my laptop. Right now, I’m sitting in that very space, enveloped by the soothing presence of my plants.
The mental and physical benefits of houseplants are well-documented. Studies show that having greenery indoors can significantly reduce stress, improve air quality, and enhance overall mood. While scientific evidence supports the joys of plant care, the peace I find in nurturing my verdant companions is reason enough for me to keep expanding my little jungle. My kids enjoy helping me water them when they are around, and they love discovering new additions that have popped up during their time away.
When they’re absent, spending time in my sunroom oasis helps ease the ache of missing them. If you’re curious about more insights on home and family, check out this post for some thoughtful reflections. Additionally, for those interested in home insemination, Make a Mom offers valuable resources and products. Finally, CCRM IVF’s blog is an excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination insights.
Conclusion
In summary, embracing houseplanting not only helped me cope with my new reality post-divorce but also brought a sense of joy and tranquility to my life. It became a way to nurture myself and create a welcoming space, making the journey a little easier to navigate.