In June 2018, at the age of 24, I experienced a herniated disc in my cervical spine that resulted in severe compression of my spinal cord and caused two of my vertebrae to grind against each other. By the time I received a diagnosis, my spinal cord had sustained significant damage, leaving surgery as my only option to prevent paralysis. This was a year and a half ago, and since my operation, I have been living with chronic pain every single day, despite assurances from my nurses that I would “bounce back quickly.”
My surgeon became increasingly frustrated with my persistent pain after the surgery. Four months post-op, after enduring a major procedure and a recovery period expected to last at least six months, I was informed that he had done all he could. Shortly thereafter, he recommended I see another surgeon and explore pain management options. In simpler terms, he lost patience with me. I felt as though I had been operated on, abandoned, and left to deal with my suffering alone.
Despite my spine not healing as anticipated, I was recently told by my new surgeon that there are signs of improvement. You might assume I’d be overjoyed by this news, but instead, I found myself in tears. It’s hard to feel relief from a positive scan when the pain remains unyielding. While I am glad my spine is stabilizing, the added uncertainty about my ongoing pain is incredibly frustrating. “Sorry you’re in pain, but your scans look fine” just doesn’t cut it anymore; I crave answers, but they remain elusive.
Understanding Chronic Pain
Living with chronic pain today often feels like shouting into an empty void. The harsh reality is that the medical community does not fully understand chronic pain, and it’s still unclear why some individuals are more susceptible than others. Some physicians suggest that factors such as emotional trauma, isolation, depression, and anxiety may contribute to an increased risk for chronic pain, while others attribute it to underlying diseases. In my situation, chronic nerve damage and inflammation are likely culprits, as is the case for many others dealing with pain following injury and illness.
Despite ongoing research, effective medications for severe pain remain scarce, with narcotics being one of the few options available. However, due to the current opioid crisis and resulting restrictions on prescriptions, it’s chronic pain patients like me who are left to bear the brunt of this issue. A few months after my surgery, my opioid medication was dramatically reduced by two-thirds in just one week. What previously managed my pain now had to last an entire day, which not only intensified my physical discomfort but also plunged my mental state into despair. For the first time in years, thoughts of suicide crossed my mind. I felt as if I was being punished for expressing my genuine pain.
The Struggles of Living with Chronic Pain
Just because there are no clear causes or effective treatments does not mean that the 50 million Americans suffering from chronic pain should be ignored. This lack of recognition only amplifies feelings of helplessness and frustration. I find myself constantly battling with insurance companies and struggling to have my concerns heard by my medical team. My nurses have given me disapproving looks, and pharmacists hesitate when filling my prescriptions.
Let’s be honest: this mistreatment of chronic pain patients often feels like a lack of trust. Regardless of whether or not my pain is believed, its severity remains unchanged. There are days when holding a phone becomes impossible due to weakness and pain. Simple tasks like fastening buttons or opening containers now pose significant challenges, and my overall quality of life has diminished dramatically. I once enjoyed taking my children out for various activities, but my inability to engage as I once did has led to a 70-pound weight gain over the past year and a half. The anxiety and depression stemming from my injury and the uncertainty of my pain fluctuate, and as I get passed from doctor to doctor, my mental health deteriorates further.
A Call for Recognition
While the root causes of chronic pain remain a mystery, it is essential for the world to recognize the profound impact this condition has on patients. Ignoring chronic pain only exacerbates the suffering of those enduring it. For more insights on related topics, you can visit this blog post. Additionally, Make a Mom offers valuable information on artificial insemination kits. For anyone considering pregnancy, this resource on pregnancy is highly recommended.
In summary, while the causes of chronic pain may still be up for discussion, its effects are all too real and deserve attention and understanding.