An Open Letter to the Working Mom from the Stay-at-Home Mom

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Dear Working Mom,

Thanks for reaching out. Like you, I’m tired of the endless debate about who works harder, who sacrifices more, and who loves their children the most. It seems pointless, doesn’t it? I completely agree: to bridge this gap created by the media, we must strive to understand one another better. Your message offered me valuable insight into your life, and now I’d like to share some thoughts about my experience as a stay-at-home mom (SAHM).

Here are five things I want you to know:

  1. I don’t feel judged by you. I understand some working moms might look down on SAHMs, just as some stay-at-home moms may feel superior. There will always be those who thrive on judgment, but I haven’t felt that from you. I believe we should be allies rather than adversaries. Let’s ignore the negativity from those who prefer to engage in the so-called “Mommy Wars.”
  2. I admire your ability to juggle it all. Honestly, how do you manage? I’m frequently overwhelmed by motherhood, and it often feels chaotic. The pressure of daily chores sometimes leaves me in tears. I can’t fathom how you find the time to work outside the home while also cooking, cleaning, and being a present mom. You’re doing an incredible job.
  3. Making connections with other moms isn’t easy for me. Contrary to what you might think, my introverted nature makes it hard to strike up conversations. When I see fellow SAHMs at the park, I struggle to find common ground. It’s not as simple as asking what each other does for work; my day revolves around diaper changes and trying to keep the peace. If I don’t approach you, it’s not because I’m judging—it’s likely due to my nerves. So, if you ever want to chat, don’t hesitate to come over. A compliment about our kids is always a great icebreaker!
  4. Being a SAHM can be challenging, too. I know I’m fortunate to be home with my kids, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Just like you have deadlines, I have my own pressures—like managing a toddler’s schedule. Sometimes, I yearn for a moment of adult interaction or even just a quiet space to recharge. I can imagine you miss your kids while at work, just as I sometimes long for a bit of solitude away from the chaos of home.
  5. I appreciate you. Yes, you read that right. Your hard work makes my role easier. When my children are sick, you’re the doctor they see. You’re the teacher guiding them when they struggle and the bus driver saving me trips to school. I see your sacrifices, and I’m grateful for everything you do.

So, dear Working Mom, let’s put aside labels and the opinions of others. What truly matters is that we both love our children deeply. That’s what unites us.

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To summarize, let’s focus on the love we share for our kids, support one another, and rise above the unnecessary competition.


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