You’re a mother of four kids all under the age of four, and if we’re honest, I can imagine that you often feel overwhelmed before the day has even started. Your feet haven’t touched the ground yet, but you’re already met with the sounds of fussing and the persistent cries of “Mommy, I’m hungryyy!” echoing through the house.
The youngest is demanding a feeding—whether it’s breastfeeding or a bottle—while the toddler throws a fit over wanting some Mickey Mouse. Meanwhile, the preschoolers are at it again, squabbling over toys. Every child needs to be dressed, their hair styled, teeth brushed, and the right colored sippy cups must be located.
In the midst of picking up the same toys for the umpteenth time, along with hidden snack wrappers and nearly empty sippy cups, you find yourself mumbling in exhaustion, “What’s the point?”
As you serve the fourth plate of pancakes—having already sampled the mess of a few—you realize the kids have suddenly decided that pancakes are off the menu. How did that happen? Isn’t that just how it goes for us moms of many?
You pour your energy into cleaning throughout the day, only to face the same mess (if not more) by nightfall. You step on Legos, shuffle toys aside to create a path, and wipe up spills, only to let the clutter accumulate until bedtime when you stare down at the overwhelming chaos you’ve accumulated during the day.
Your sense of self often feels diminished, as if a heavy weight is pressing down on your chest while you juggle your children’s needs and desires, all the while yearning to fulfill even a sliver of your own.
You give endlessly, yet somewhere in the day, feelings of inadequacy creep in. Did I give them enough personal attention? Was my less-than-ideal dinner nutritious enough? Did I engage with them genuinely? Why do I find myself raising my voice so often?
If only we, the moms of many, could see ourselves through our children’s eyes…
Despite being stretched thin and utterly exhausted, we are more than enough for them. We are their stability, their constant presence, and their source of comfort. They feel safe enough around us to act out, reject our carefully prepared meals, and throw tantrums during moments meant for joy.
We may be one person spread across a crowd, but we are their sanctuary, even on days when our emotions are frayed.
Sure, our homes may remain chaotic for years to come. Yes, at least one of the kids’ rooms probably harbors some mysterious odor, and finding matching socks is a challenge. On good days, we wash four sippy cups; on bad days, we scrub sixteen after a long hunt for the last one.
The mornings can feel never-ending, and nap time is a battle of wills as you repeatedly ask them to return to their beds. Our children bless us with their “witching hour” anywhere between 5-7 p.m., and as bedtime approaches, we know not to underestimate the struggle that comes from so many little desires.
Moms of many lead lives filled with chaos and mess. But if we had the chance to do it all over again, we would in a heartbeat. We wouldn’t change a single moment.
Our little ones bring us pure joy as they navigate their childhood together. We receive an abundance of messy kisses, countless hugs, and endless cuddles. They believe the world revolves around us, and we witness the beauty of their little-kid antics all at once.
Our refrigerators are adorned with the artwork of four budding Picassos, and those masterpieces bring smiles as we reach for the morning bottle. With each other, they will always find companionship in play, sleep, and yes, even arguments.
Moms of many, there are times when you feel unappreciated, drained, and overwhelmed by your various roles. Your footing may feel unstable, yet you are the one who holds your children’s world together. If they could see the internal storms we weather while they only perceive the sunshine, they would want us to practice self-compassion. Because even in our t-shirt-stained, weary states, we are more than enough for our delightful crew of little ones.
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Summary
Being a mother of four under four can be overwhelming, filled with chaos and the constant feeling of inadequacy. Yet, despite the exhaustion and mess, these mothers are more than enough for their children, providing love, stability, and companionship. The journey, though challenging, is filled with joy and connection as they navigate parenthood together.