Let’s face it—lawyers are a prime target for humor. If you happen to be in this profession, take it lightly (no need for lawsuits here). In fact, it’s a testament to how much we appreciate your role. That’s why we enjoy sharing a chuckle or two at your expense, affectionately known as lawyer jokes. Consider this collection an exhibit from A to 101.
Becoming a lawyer is no easy feat; just look at Simon from that show How I Met Your Mother who makes it seem like a walk in the park. Law is such a fulfilling career that even celebrities like Kim Kardashian are diving in (she’s not a lawyer yet, but she’ll be taking the bar exam soon). So even if your legal knowledge begins and ends with Law and Order, you’ll still get a kick out of these jokes.
You might not need legal counsel, but everyone can appreciate a good punchline about one. Lawyers often deal with serious matters and can use a laugh now and then, so share these gems with any lawyers or law students you know. It’ll brighten their day—almost as much as winning a case would!
- What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue!
- An attorney says to his client, “I have good news and bad news.” The client asks, “What’s the bad news?” “Your DNA is all over the crime scene.” “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is 130.”
- A lawyer tried a creative defense for a burglary case: “My client just inserted his arm into the window and took a few small items. You can’t punish the whole person for what his arm did!” The judge replied, “Alright, I sentence the arm to a year in prison; it can choose to take the defendant with it.”
- How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? None; they’d rather keep their clients in the dark.
- At the zoo, a keeper struggled to catch escaping snakes. Finally, he shouted, “Quick, call a lawyer!” “Why a lawyer?” someone asked. “We need someone who speaks their language.”
These jokes certainly hit the mark! You can throw in more humor, like when a man in a bar orders a drink after looking into his pocket repeatedly, saying, “I have my lawyer’s pictures in here. When he starts to look honest, I know I’ve had enough.” Or the classic, “Why did the lawyer’s chicken cross the road? He had an easement.”
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In summary, a good lawyer joke can lighten the mood and remind us that humor is a universal language. So why not share a few with your legal friends? After all, laughter is the best medicine, even in the courtroom.