Recently, I found myself lecturing my 12-year-old son, Jason, after he got into trouble during his gardening class. He and a friend decided to explore beyond the school garden and began striking random trees with one of the school rakes, trying to break it. The principal caught them in the act, and to make matters worse, my wife, his mother, was the one teaching that class.
While this isn’t the most serious infraction a junior high student could commit, it was certainly embarrassing for my wife to have to deal with her own son being brought to her office. I made it clear to him how surprised I was that she didn’t give him a stern talking-to right in front of his classmates. He looked down, clearly ashamed. Once I had finished outlining his punishment, I reassured him, saying, “What you did was wrong, but I want you to know that I still love you.”
This isn’t the first time I’ve had to discipline one of my children, and it certainly won’t be the last. The phrase “I love you” is a constant presence in our household. Each morning, before I head to work, I hug my kids and say it. I do the same when I return home, and I always make sure to say it when I tuck them in at night. In my twelve years as a father, I can’t recall a single day when I didn’t express my love for them. I sometimes wonder if I say it too often, but I believe there’s no such thing as too much love for your children.
I didn’t hear that phrase often while growing up. My family life was quite unstable, with my father frequently in and out of jail due to addiction and my mother working hard as a single parent. When I was 14, I moved in with my grandmother, who made it a point to tell me she loved me multiple times a day. No matter what mistakes I made, she always ended her lectures with “I love you.” Looking back, I realize that this unwavering affection gave me a sense of security that I want to replicate for my children.
I express love even when I’m frustrated with my kids. Whether they’re excelling or struggling, I want them to understand that my love is unconditional. It’s a constant foundation in our relationship, serving as their safety net. This doesn’t mean I overlook their mistakes or that I don’t have high expectations. It simply means they know they are loved, regardless of their choices.
Returning to my earlier story, when I told Jason that I loved him after reprimanding him, he didn’t roll his eyes or argue. Instead, he looked up and replied, “I love you too, Dad.” In that moment, it felt like he understood that my actions stemmed from a place of love. Our relationship has developed over time, and I believe we wouldn’t be this close if I hadn’t made it a priority to express my love consistently.
If you’d like to read more about parenting and love, check out this insightful article on home insemination, which discusses the importance of communication and emotional connection. For those interested in more resources about pregnancy and home insemination, I recommend visiting Progyny for valuable information as well.
In summary, expressing love to your children daily is crucial for building a strong relationship. It provides them with a sense of security and support, helping them navigate the ups and downs of life while knowing they are unconditionally loved.