Dear Mom,
I want to take a moment to express my gratitude and apologize.
It’s Friday night, and for a change, you’re heading out with friends, a well-deserved break. Just you — not a mom, not a partner, not responsible for anyone but yourself. The same spirited person who once borrowed her mother’s car to skip school with Sophie. The same woman who excelled in sports, danced with grace, and embraced motherhood like a true champion.
As I sit on your bed at 7 p.m., I watch you apply a touch of makeup, just for yourself. I admire your sparkling jewelry, treating it with the reverence of a museum visitor. I breathe in your perfume, cherishing it like the delicate petals of roses. We chat and laugh like friends, as the sun sets and I see a flicker of youthful potential in your eyes—an aspect of you I only know through old photos and Grandma’s tales shared over sweet cups of tea. In these moments, I catch glimpses of the woman you once were, the person who met Dad when he was just Jake. Those vibrant pieces of you faded away the day I came into your life.
I’m deeply sorry for how I shaped your journey. But I’m also incredibly grateful. The echoes of your past fill me with life. They weave the fabric of your soul and remind me of the sacrifices you made for me. How could I ever become the person I am without your influence? You, who I ushered into motherhood, who I kept up at night with my cries and late-night escapades. You are the version of yourself I aspire to emulate.
I apologize for the worry lines on your forehead and the strain on your finances. I’m sorry I altered your story. Yet, amidst the changes, I see reflections of you in the mirror.
Thank you, Mom, for my striking hazel eyes and confident voice. While I may never know the adventurous Sara who once fearlessly approached neighbors to skate, I have become a version of her because of you. I won’t meet the Sara who spontaneously backpacked through Europe, but I am proud to be that rebellious spirit’s daughter. My life is the one you made possible.
I regret that my arrival shifted your plans. But I’m thankful for that shift because where you envisioned growing fresh tomatoes, you cultivated laughter and joy. Where you worried that lazy days in bed might negatively affect me, you actually taught me the importance of taking time to rest and recharge. Your lessons on the value of slow, silly days filled with warmth have shaped who I am.
For every moment you wish you could change, I celebrate how things unfolded. It was in those summer cicadas and chilly autumns—within the trials, worries, and imperfections—that you helped form me.
Now, as I step out on Friday nights, I often see the woman I admired so much as a child. I feel like you.
Thank you for everything.
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Summary
This heartfelt letter from a nearly grown daughter to her mother reflects on the sacrifices and changes that come with motherhood. The daughter expresses gratitude for the lessons learned and the person she has become through her mother’s influence, celebrating the beauty in their journey together.