So, I did something a bit out of the ordinary the other evening. Now, considering I’m just a typical working mom with three kids, my version of wild may not seem all that wild. I spontaneously decided to take my three little ones (ages 7, 6, and 2) to the pool after work, and it wasn’t even Friday—talk about crazy! I walked in the door, saw the impending meltdowns brewing, and then looked at the mess that had taken over my house. In that moment, I declared, “Get your swimsuits on; we’re heading to the pool!”
I’ll admit, a part of me was trying to avoid the dinner prep struggle, but honestly, I yearned to share some fun with them. They looked like they needed a break from the usual routine, and even though we only spent a couple of hours there, we had a blast! The spontaneity of it made it feel even more special, especially since our evenings usually revolve around dinner, homework, and bedtime rituals.
Now, for anyone who hasn’t tried to wrangle three young kids after a long day at work, let me tell you—it can be quite the challenge. After a full day of work, my to-do list includes making dinner, cleaning up, starting laundry, and prepping for the next day. Plus, who really wants to dive into anything complicated at 5 p.m.? It’s that time of day when everyone feels worn out and ready to unwind, especially me. Yet, I’ve come to realize that my kids really only get my undivided attention during those evening hours. So, I’ve made a concerted effort to power through, sip on some coffee, and be a more upbeat version of myself for them after my workday.
The 5 p.m. version of me is the first chance they get to connect with me all day. It’s our time to relax, chat, laugh, and engage in activities that I can’t fit in during my busy work hours. Don’t get me wrong; my kids have a wonderful time throughout the day, playing with friends or engaging in activities whether they’re at school, camp, or with a nanny. However, the real bonding happens when I come home, and I often find myself transitioning directly from my work responsibilities to my motherly duties.
During the school year, our evenings often fly by with activities, leaving us scrambling to get everyone ready. However, I’ve learned that quality time doesn’t have to be extravagant. Sometimes it’s as simple as 30 minutes of jumping on the trampoline or riding bikes together. Occasionally, I’ll take two kids to the park while the other is at soccer practice, instead of tackling chores.
I believe in the importance of allowing my children to experience boredom, fostering their creativity and encouraging them to find their own entertainment. That said, I often go straight from my work tasks to my home responsibilities, which can make my kids feel overlooked. I’ve noticed that if I can carve out just a little bit of one-on-one time with them after work, they are happier, and the rest of our evening flows much more smoothly.
That brings me to an important point—if I want to prioritize quality time with my kids, something else needs to take a backseat. I can say this with absolute certainty; we only have so many hours in a day. Most moms I know have their schedules tightly organized to maximize productivity, and I definitely am not sacrificing any more sleep.
What tends to get sacrificed in my household is home-cooked meals or tidying up. This means we often end up with takeout or sandwiches for dinner, and toys may linger on the floor for days. I’ve come to accept that this is part of the trade-off. Yes, we need to make time for chores and errands, but ultimately, I’ve found that when I devote even a brief half-hour to having fun with my kids after work, they are happier, and I feel more fulfilled as a mom when I let some of the less urgent tasks slide.
So, grab that coffee (or maybe a glass of wine), order that pizza, and break out a board game. You might just discover that it’s not only your kids who end up feeling happier.
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Summary
Balancing the demands of motherhood with work can be challenging, especially when trying to carve out quality time with kids. Acknowledging the importance of the 5 p.m. connection, even if it means letting some chores slide, can lead to happier children and a more fulfilled mom. Prioritizing fun and connection over perfection can make all the difference in family life.