In today’s parenting discussions, the concept of sharing has come under scrutiny. While the phrase “sharing is caring” remains widely accepted, it seems the implementation of this principle is up for debate. Recently, a post by a mother named Sarah gained traction online with a bold declaration: “MY CHILD IS NOT REQUIRED TO SHARE WITH YOURS.” This caught my attention because it highlighted a growing sentiment among parents about personal boundaries.
In her post, Sarah recounted how her son faced demands from other children at the park to use his toys, and she encouraged him to “just say no.” While I commend any parent teaching their children to assert themselves and to respect others’ autonomy, I stand firm in my belief that my children should share.
However, to clarify, I won’t enforce sharing with other kids. There’s a distinction here.
Why I Insist on Sharing
So, why do I insist on sharing with my own kids, despite the arguments that forced sharing isn’t suited for development or reflective of real-world interactions? Here are my reasons:
- Privilege Requires Responsibility.
My children enjoy privileges and resources that many others do not. They were born into a situation of abundance, and it’s crucial for them to understand the importance of sharing that privilege. For example, our family has opened our home to a mother and child seeking asylum, leading to occasional disputes over toys. In these cases, I make it clear that my kids must share what they have. Their comfort comes from a place of luck and opportunity, and it’s vital they recognize that and give back. - Teaching Selflessness.
Kids naturally lean toward selfishness; they are children after all! It’s our role as parents to guide them in learning how to share. While we engage in discussions about the significance of sharing, sometimes it means pulling back their instinctual desire to hoard. - Respecting Autonomy While Encouraging Generosity.
I remember a day at the playground when my kids were on the swings, and a group of children approached wanting a turn. Instead of denying their request, I facilitated sharing: “You can swing for a few more minutes, then it’ll be their turn.” It’s all about balance—teaching them to be generous while respecting their desires. - People Matter More Than Possessions.
At its core, sharing reflects kindness. For instance, if a neighbor needed to borrow my car, I’d likely oblige. My approach to sharing extends beyond toys; it’s about fostering a mindset of generosity and compassion. If someone asked for my sandwich at the park, I would gladly share, knowing I can replace it later. - Modeling Equity.
As someone who values social justice and equity, it feels hypocritical to demand that my kids hold onto their toys when I advocate for sharing resources in a broader sense. If I expect society to share resources, I must instill that value in my children. - Teaching Boundaries Alongside Sharing.
Sharing doesn’t mean relinquishing all personal boundaries. I believe it’s essential to let kids have certain cherished items, like their favorite toys, which they don’t have to share. They can also choose what they are comfortable sharing, which fosters an understanding of boundaries. - Fostering Emotional Resilience.
I find wisdom in the concept of non-attachment, which teaches us that while we can enjoy our possessions, we shouldn’t cling too tightly to them. This principle helps children navigate sharing and loss, ultimately leading to greater happiness. - Encouraging Life Skills.
Ultimately, sharing cultivates patience, teamwork, and even friendship. When kids learn to share, they may discover new connections and experiences, teaching them invaluable life lessons.
While the notion of making kids share can seem outdated or overly simplistic, I firmly believe in its importance.
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In conclusion, while sharing may feel like an unpopular rule, it’s one I am proud to uphold. It teaches compassion, responsibility, and the importance of community connection.