I just picked my daughter up from yet another extravagant birthday party—one that seemed to outdo all the others this year. She bounded toward the car with an energy I hadn’t seen in a while. The reason? This particular party featured 14-karat gold initial necklaces for each girl. Yes, you read that right—more extravagant than the gift we sent for the birthday girl and even the gift I gave my daughter for her own birthday. As I drove away, my hands firmly gripping the steering wheel at 10 and 2, I couldn’t help but fantasize about what I would do to the mom responsible for this madness.
Honestly, I’ve never invested much thought into the birthday party gift bags. In fact, the whole concept of giving gifts to other kids for my child’s birthday is something I find perplexing. For my son’s last birthday, I hastily grabbed eight candy bars at Target just ten minutes before the party began, tossed them into a bowl, and let each child choose one as they left. I was quite pleased with my ability to think on my feet.
While I’m not suggesting we resort to cheap trinkets from discount stores, it seems some parents have taken it to a whole new level of absurdity. Here’s a quick rundown of the over-the-top favors I’ve encountered:
- Monogrammed golf balls and an actual putter for a putt-putt birthday.
- A gumball machine brimming with gumballs—courtesy of the birthday kid’s dentist dad.
- Custom sunglasses, a T-shirt, and a makeup purse for a “Rock Star VIP” theme, complete with a personalized red carpet and paparazzi.
- A live fish in a plastic bag. Yes, I spent my Sunday scouring for a fish bowl and everything else needed to care for it, because that fish deserved a proper welcome.
- A Pottery Barn tote filled with flip-flops, sunscreen, and a monogrammed beach towel.
- A $32 box of sand art that will forever haunt my memories.
Can we take a moment to be real? These extravagant favors are more about impressing the other parents than about making kids happy. Let’s face it—most of us aren’t that fond of other people’s children. It’s as if some parents are in a constant competition to one-up each other. I can almost envision Mrs. Jones lounging on a private island, sipping a martini, and thinking, “What else can I get these crazy parents to do?”
Here’s a thought: if you’re so concerned about appearances, why not send the kids home with gifts for their moms? Perhaps a stylish handbag filled with mini bottles of wine? Or how about a subscription to a Wine of the Month club? A little Advil and a gift card for a much-needed pedicure would be appreciated too after the hassle of picking up your kid’s gift.
Until that day comes, let’s dial it back. Our kids will be perfectly content enjoying your child’s petting zoo-themed party (the giraffe was a real hit), savoring food-truck tacos, and indulging in that three-tiered gluten-free birthday cake, all without the need for a party favor.
For more insight on parenting and the unique challenges we face, check out this post on navigating birthday parties.
In summary, the trend of extravagant birthday party favors seems to stem more from parental competition than any real desire to please the children involved. It’s time we focus on what truly matters—creating joyful experiences for our kids, without the added pressure of keeping up with each other.
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