10 Ways for Moms to Seem Cooler Than They Actually Are

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Hello, fellow not-so-cool moms! If you’re anything like me, your cool factor took a nosedive after having kids. But don’t worry! Here are ten clever tips to help you channel your inner Danny Zuko (with a nursing bra, of course) and give off that effortless vibe.

  1. Master the Lingo: Swap out “how are you?” for the oh-so-casual “Sup?” And instead of saying “whatever,” flash a big W with your fingers. Trust me, this is totally in.
  2. Tune Into the Right Beats: While I thought I was rocking it with Sirius Alt Nation, I’ve discovered Sirius XMU. It might stand for “university,” or it could be some cool new slang. Stay tuned for updates!
  3. Dress to Impress: Right now, showing some midriff is in style. If you’re not ready to expose your post-baby belly, try high-rise nude pantyhose pulled up to your chest. Voilà! Instant coolness.
  4. Drop Some Not-So-Subtle Hints: Casually mention your desire for wild nights with your partner. Something like, “I’d love a threesome, but finding a sitter who can speak Mandarin is tough.” That’ll get a chuckle!
  5. Get Adventurous with Friends: Go for those trendy paint nights or scrapbooking sessions. Here’s a secret: sneak in a flask filled with a white wine cooler. You’ll thank yourself when 5 a.m. rolls around!
  6. Embrace Technology: If you haven’t already, get a smartphone. It’s more than just a phone; it’s a camera and mini-computer in one! Explore different apps, you might even find some outdated ones like Friendster.
  7. Social Media Savvy: Remember, Instagram is not just for photos of your kids. Get into “selfies” (you know, shots from above to hide those jowls) and “ussies” with your partner while doing mundane things like buying tomato sauce.
  8. Get Hashtag Happy: Make everything more fun with hashtags! When you pick up your sick kid from preschool, say something like, “Hashtag vomit, hashtag mom life!” Snap a pic of the secretary’s reaction for extra points.
  9. Watch Indie Films: Go ahead and claim you watched something obscure like The Fault in Our Stars. Pair it with a cute ussie of you and your partner in front of Netflix, and don’t forget the flasks!
  10. Stay on Trend with Parenting Styles: Whether it’s helicopter parenting, free-range, or unschooling, just hover anxiously over your kids while they play with the neighbor’s dog. Hashtag cool mom, right?

With these tips, you can boost your cool mom status in no time. Remember, it’s all about the little things that make you feel connected and trendy in this wild parenting journey. For more parenting hacks, check out this post on our blog about staying sane during motherhood.

In summary, being a mom doesn’t mean you have to lose your coolness. By incorporating some trendy language, music, and social media savvy, you can navigate the parenting world with style. Just remember to have fun with it!


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