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Parenting
By Jamie Carson
Updated: Oct. 29, 2018
Originally Published: Oct. 29, 2018
The other day, I found myself captivated by my 7-year-old son, Oliver, who was deep in his own world. I could hear his animated voice drifting from the living room while I prepared dinner in the kitchen. Curious, I peeked in to see him engaged in a solo performance, narrating an elaborate adventure as he stuffed various toys and books into a bag.
This wasn’t an unusual sight; Oliver was lost in a story of his own making. His imagination was vibrant, and he seemed blissfully unaware of the world around him. I felt a pang of envy. While I too enjoy daydreaming, my moments of creative thought often get drowned out by daily responsibilities. I find myself mentally drafting articles or imagining leading workshops, all while tackling mundane tasks. I envision conversations with people I’ve never met, or replay scenarios from my day.
Two of my three children frequently engage in imaginative play, where toys serve as mere props in their narratives. I often catch snippets of their conversations, filled with whimsical characters and plots that might seem nonsensical to me. However, these daydreams are not for my benefit; they are personal journeys that entertain and aid in emotional processing. They allow for bursts of creativity that can ignite new ideas.
When it comes to children, daydreaming can often be misinterpreted as a lack of focus or a distraction. It’s true that daydreams may interfere when I’m trying to get Oliver to brush his teeth or when teachers notice a student doodling instead of solving math problems. A child lost in thought might be perceived as defiant or unable to complete tasks, leading to assumptions about potential neurological issues like ADHD or autism.
Yet, there’s a crucial distinction between a wandering imagination and a more serious mental health concern. A child who daydreams can usually be redirected back to the present without much difficulty. In fact, daydreaming is often linked to positive outcomes in learning. Many high-achieving students are daydreamers. This creative thinking fosters curiosity and problem-solving skills, while also enhancing social interactions. Daydreamers often navigate social complexities in their minds, developing empathy and conflict-resolution skills.
Research from institutions like the University of Wisconsin and the Max Planck Institute for Human Cognitive and Brain Science reveals that a wandering mind may lead to improved working memory. This cognitive function helps us retain and recall information even amidst distractions—a vital skill in our busy lives. Sometimes, our best ideas emerge during mundane activities, such as showering or driving.
When I daydream, I often don’t recognize it until something pulls me back to reality. But the lingering effects of that mental escape are undeniable. I feel less stressed, more open to solutions, and able to think more clearly. Kids experience similar benefits. In a world that can often be overwhelming, zoning out can be a healthier coping mechanism than acting out. A child who processes their emotions through imaginative play is less likely to disrupt a classroom or engage in negative behavior.
Interestingly, my child who struggles to engage in imaginative play often faces difficulties with emotions, socializing, and navigating her day. She tends to act out and wrestles with anxiety, which often leads to trouble. This illustrates a clear connection between emotional intelligence and the ability to daydream.
While it’s essential to guide our children back to reality when necessary, we should not discourage their daydreaming. It provides them with a means to entertain themselves while we handle daily chores. It enables them to process their emotions and fosters creativity. Daydreaming is an opportunity for kids to explore their imaginations without limitations.
As parents, we should embrace our children’s dreams. When they seem to be staring into space or lost in conversation with themselves, they are engaged in vital creative thinking that enhances their social skills and helps them process the information they encounter throughout the day.
Let them dream!
Summary:
Encouraging children to daydream is crucial for their emotional and creative development. Far from being distractions, daydreams help kids process their emotions, improve social skills, and enhance problem-solving abilities. While guiding them back to responsibilities is necessary, we should celebrate their imaginative journeys, as they contribute significantly to their growth and learning.