Dear Emma and Lily,
Tomorrow marks my return to the workplace, and I can’t help but feel a wave of emotions wash over me. I hope that this transition is more challenging for me than it is for you. It’s remarkable how the past twelve weeks have flown by—quicker than I ever anticipated. I had hoped that going back to work after having my second child would be easier, but it seems to be even more difficult.
Emma, having those precious moments with you and snuggling with your little sister, Mia, has been a joy beyond measure. With Mia being my second child, I’ve come to realize just how fleeting this time truly is, and I wish I could hold onto it forever.
As I prepare to head back to work, I reflect on the comforting words people share to ease my worries. They tell me that you’ll admire my dedication and learn the value of hard work. They say that spending time apart will make our moments together even more meaningful. Others remind me that many moms today have to work, and that you won’t remember these days without me. While I hope those thoughts are true, they don’t fully ease the heaviness in my heart.
I want you to see my passion for my career as a high school assistant principal, where I care for 600 other students, but I never want you to feel as though my job takes precedence over you. Yes, your dad and I could potentially manage on one income, but that would come with significant sacrifices, impacting what we can offer you and placing undue pressure on him as the sole provider. I want us to be the best parents we can be, and I believe that includes me working.
Tomorrow, as I step back into my role, I recognize how fortunate I am. I’m grateful that your dad will be able to spend time with you during the week, creating special memories. I appreciate having a wonderful partner who supports my career and a trusted daycare provider who will care for you. I also feel blessed that my workplace is family-friendly, where my colleagues truly value you both.
You are surrounded by love and support, and I know you will be well cared for in my absence, but my heart still aches for those moments together.
As I go back to work, I want to make a few promises to you. I vow to give you my undivided attention during the time we do have. I’ll strive to disconnect from work, put my phone aside, and fully engage with you two. We’ll create fun memories together, whether that means going on adventures or simply lounging in our pajamas watching movies. Whatever we choose to do, I promise to be present, because you both deserve nothing less.
I also hope that when the time comes for you to have children, should you choose to, that things will be different—that our society will recognize the need for more than twelve weeks of maternity leave. I regret that I can’t spend more time with you now, but please know that even when I’m not there, my love for you remains constant. I’m working hard to provide for you, and when I come home, I’ll shed my work persona and simply be your mom, because that is my most important role.
With all my love,
Mom