In today’s parenting landscape, trends like free-range and slow parenting are all the rage. Many parents are focusing on recreating those carefree childhood summers reminiscent of the ’70s. It’s enough to make some of us question our choices and wonder if we’re overindulging our kids.
Last summer, I penned a light-hearted piece about sending my son off to sleepaway camp for seven weeks. My intention was to share the humorous side of my anxiety regarding his first extended time away from home. While some readers found joy in my narrative, others were far less supportive. I was taken aback by the judgmental comments from other parents: “You’re out of your mind!” “You’ll never get this time back!” “How could you send your child away for two months?” “That’s just wrong! Summer is for families to spend time together!” It seemed the underlying message was that I sent him away for my own relaxation. In reality, the choice for overnight camp came with plenty of stress and introspection about whether it was the right move.
Both my husband and I work, so I appreciate suggestions like “let’s do chores in the morning followed by family outings to the beach,” but I can only enforce that during my limited vacation time in the summer. Sure, I could have quit my job, homeschooled my children, and provided them with a summer filled with free play. But I didn’t. So, please, stop judging my choices.
My son thrives on activity. He needs to be engaged—think having a catch with someone nearly all day. Unsupervised free time simply doesn’t suit his personality. I could have enrolled him in various weekly sports camps for the entire 13 weeks he’s off school. I could have also chosen a commune, but that wasn’t on the table. So again, back off.
Moreover, my son needed to cultivate independence. He had to learn how to interact with peers, discover his own voice, and make decisions without me hovering nearby, constantly reminding him to “slow down” or “be careful.” Could I have fostered this independence in other ways? Sure. But I chose not to. So, let’s chill out on the criticism.
He also craved a connection to nature. Living in a bustling city means he can’t just wander into the woods to explore or lie in a field gazing at the stars. I could have taken him camping for a couple of weekends, but given my aversion to horror films, that wasn’t happening. So, again, back off.
Lastly, my son needed a break from technology. He spent two months without a phone, tablet, or TV. I could have imposed a no-electronics policy at home, but I didn’t. So, please, stop with the judgment.
What I’m getting at is that this list reflects my son’s needs, which may differ from yours. Every family dynamic is unique, and like you, I make decisions that I believe are best for my child. For him, a structured, extended time away from home was the right choice—and it paid off. He had an incredible summer.
He swam in lakes daily and camped out in teepees. He started the summer as a shy kid, hesitant about most things. By the end, I saw pictures of him playing soccer in the rain, muddy and exhilarated, celebrating victories with his new friends. He painted his face for team competitions and enthusiastically joined in dining hall chants until he was hoarse. My son emerged from camp with newfound resilience, confidence, and self-sufficiency. He learned how to approach kids he hadn’t met before to organize pickup games. He flourished in a safe environment that encouraged exploration and growth.
Every family’s summer choices are influenced by finances, work commitments, and the unique personalities of their children. So let’s stop battling over parenting styles and recognize that, like every child, each decision regarding summer activities is distinct. For us, it was sleepaway camp, and we’re thrilled to be sending him back this year.
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In summary, every child’s needs and each family’s situation are unique. Embrace what works for you and your family, and remember that what matters most is making decisions that align with your child’s best interests.
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