Last Friday marked my son’s sixth-grade graduation, a moment filled with both pride and mixed emotions. The ceremony included a touching video montage that showcased the kids’ baby photos alongside their current yearbook images, leaving many parents teary-eyed and struggling to keep their emotions in check. After handing out diplomas, the principal announced the presentation of the Presidential Awards, which honor students who have achieved a GPA of over 3.5 from third to sixth grade.
As I watched, about a third of the graduating class took the stage to receive their awards. The applause was uplifting, and initially, I thought that was the end of it. However, it became clear that this was just the first round, with more awards for those who achieved GPAs of 3.75 to 3.99, and a special category for perfect 4.0s.
For context, my children attend a choice school that emphasizes STEM subjects and maintains a rigorous curriculum. This public school is highly sought after, with parents required to volunteer 20 hours each year and students typically being high achievers. Consequently, most sixth graders were called up to receive a Presidential Award. It was heartwarming to witness parents cheering for their children, but I couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment on my son’s behalf, as he was one of the few—perhaps the only one—not to be recognized.
My son has truly thrived at this exceptional school, but his journey hasn’t been easy. Diagnosed with ADHD in second grade, we faced numerous challenges from preschool onward. It wasn’t until midway through third grade that we started medicating him. Even with the medication, we encountered rough patches, countless teacher meetings, and many nights filled with frustration over homework. The struggle was real, with numerous assignments completed but not submitted, leading to many disappointing grades.
After adjusting his medication, my son, Lucas, saw significant improvement. In fact, he earned straight A’s this last semester for the first time, a moment of pride for both him and me. Yet, the crux of the matter is this: kids who exert tremendous effort just to achieve C’s often go unnoticed. While I wholeheartedly celebrate the accomplishments of those who excel academically, I believe we owe recognition to the children who face challenges that impact their educational success. We risk unintentionally shaming those who are managing ADHD, anxiety, autism, or other struggles that complicate their academic experiences.
When Lucas approached me post-ceremony, tears welling in his eyes, he remarked, “Mom, I think I was the only one who didn’t get a Presidential Award.” It was evident that he felt this absence keenly; he recognizes the hurdles he has overcome and the hard work he has put into improving his grades. While I assured him that we would celebrate his achievements once his report card arrived, I couldn’t help but think about other children who have endured similar experiences, year after year.
If you are a parent to a child facing these challenges, you understand the effort they put in and the dedication you contribute to support them. You know that sometimes, their determination and resilience do not translate into tangible achievements. You recognize that your child may need to work twice as hard as their straight-A peers just to earn a C, and often, this effort goes unnoticed.
I’m not here to diminish the achievements of those who excel academically; they deserve every bit of recognition they receive. Instead, I want to acknowledge the parents of children who strive diligently yet may not receive awards. I see you. I see your child. I see the sacrifices you make, often hovering over your child to ensure they don’t falter despite your initial intentions to give them space. Your efforts and your child’s perseverance deserve admiration, even if they don’t come with a shiny certificate or a stamp of approval from the president.
Your child may not have garnered a prestigious award, but they have my respect and admiration, as do you.
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In summary, as we celebrate academic achievements, let’s ensure we also honor the hard work of those who may not always shine in the spotlight but demonstrate incredible resilience every day.