As I navigate the journey of aging, I’ve begun to notice the subtle changes on my face that suggest the passage of time. It all started when I realized that people around me were increasingly concerned about my emotional state. Just yesterday, a couple of conversations went something like this:
Colleague (interrupting my daydream about the charming actor topping my celebrity crush list): Good morning!
Me (with a heavy sigh): Morning.
Colleague: Are you feeling alright?
Me: Yes, why? (Wait, can she see my thoughts? Is my face betraying me?)
Colleague: You seem a bit tired.
Me: Oh, is that so? Not really, but maybe just a tad. (If “tired” equates to fantasizing about my ultimate fantasy partner, then yes, I’m exhausted.)
Colleague (raising an eyebrow): Just checking in. Let me know if you need something.
Later that day, as I settled into the lunchroom, I greeted my coworkers with a smile. My lunch was a glorious feast of leftover Chinese food, complete with succulent pieces of pork and beef skewers. I was practically drooling.
Colleague: Hey there!
Me: (grunting happily, unable to form words). This food is a dream!
Colleague: Are you alright?
Me: Absolutely! This meal is divine!
Colleague: Really? Because you looked a bit glum.
Me: Glum? No! I’m on the brink of a foodgasm!
That evening, I found myself entrenched in a binge-watching session of my favorite show, contemplating life’s mysteries. Then my partner, Jake, interrupted my reverie.
Jake: Hey, we need to chat.
Me: What? (Oh no, does he know about my crush on that handsome actor? What did I forget?)
Jake: You seem upset. Are you angry with me?
Me: No, not at all! (But why do you think that?)
Jake: Your facial expression suggests otherwise.
Me: My expression?
Jake: Yeah, you have that “11” showing.
Me: “11”? What does that even mean? I just scrubbed my face with that fancy cleansing brush I bought at that home party. Remember? I thought I was attending a casual gathering, and it turned into a makeup pitch. Did it not work?
Jake: Well, you definitely have that wrinkle between your eyebrows. And your lips are a bit tight. But you’re still gorgeous, just a little tense.
I pondered this revelation. What does my face actually convey? How could my daydreaming, food-loving, and TV-watching expressions all create concern? Then it hit me: I’ve unknowingly developed what’s commonly known as Resting Bitch Face (RBF).
RBF is characterized by a default expression that can look like a scowl rather than a neutral gaze. Fantastic. The combination of a few wrinkles and slight far-sightedness makes me appear perpetually annoyed.
Now, how can I turn this situation to my advantage? First, I’ll indulge in more daydreams about my #1 crush (it’s Edward Norton, by the way). I might even throw in some fantasies about my #2, Hugh Grant. At least my face won’t betray the fun I’m having.
Secondly, I’ll use my RBF for a bit of child intimidation. “Hey, kiddo, you think you can ignore my request to clean your room? Watch me unleash my ‘11s’!” That should do the trick!
Finally, I’m definitely getting a refund on that cleansing brush. Who needs it when my partner thinks I’m flawless?
If you’re also navigating the ups and downs of parenthood and the quest for self-care, you might find value in resources like Facts About Fertility, which provides excellent insights into pregnancy and home insemination. And for those interested in at-home options, check out Make a Mom for reputable insemination kits.
In summary, aging comes with its quirks, including unexpected facial expressions. While my RBF may raise eyebrows, I’m learning to embrace it while still indulging in the joys of life—whether that’s delicious food, entertaining shows, or daydreaming about my favorite celebrities.
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