Dear Beloved Middle Child,
Hello there, my sweet one. It’s your mom writing to you today.
First and foremost, I want you to know just how incredible you are. You are intelligent, spirited, and filled with a unique charm that I admire every day, even if I don’t express it enough.
I see you. But do you realize that I truly see you? You, the one caught between your siblings. You, who often misses out on the thrill of being the first or the nostalgia of being the last. You, who might sometimes feel a little overlooked amidst the joys and challenges that come with being both the eldest and the youngest.
I want to share some thoughts with you, my middle child. It’s true that you can sometimes feel like you’re not receiving as much attention from your parents. No matter how hard I try to balance things, I know it happens more often than I’d like.
With our first child, everything is new, and we’re navigating uncharted territory. Every milestone they achieve draws a lot of our focus as we learn and adapt. Then there’s the youngest, who, as the baby of the family, experiences a unique kind of attention. Their milestones remind us of how quickly time passes and how precious each moment is, so naturally, they often get a little extra love and indulgence.
But remember, dear middle child, you are the heart of our family story. You are the cherished filling of our family’s Oreo cookie. You reside in the center, not on the periphery.
Your position as the middle child doesn’t define you, but it will shape your experiences in ways you might not fully understand right now. I, too, was a middle child, and I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything.
There are distinct advantages to being in your role. You get to embrace both the joys and challenges of being an older sibling and a younger one, allowing you to learn and grow in ways your siblings might not. Your age proximity to them means you can create stronger bonds and memories together.
You also escape some of the pressures that often weigh heavily on the eldest and the expectations the youngest may feel. Being in the middle allows you to truly relish our family time, as you’re here for the moments that might slip by your siblings.
Yes, I understand that there are times when it can be tough to be the middle child. You may crave a more defined identity, but that flexibility is also your strength. You have the freedom to be whoever you want to be.
Research suggests that middle children often grow to be more open-minded and skilled negotiators, qualities that will serve you well throughout your life. However, it’s also noted that you might feel somewhat distant from your parents compared to your siblings, and that’s something I am committed to preventing. You are just as much my child, my heart, and my joy as your older and younger siblings. I never want you to doubt your place in this family or in my life.
You, my wonderful, unique middle child, please forgive our occasional shortcomings, and embrace your role with all its possibilities. Remember that you are loved unconditionally, now and always.
With all my love,
Mom