As I approached the final weeks of my pregnancy with my second son, I jotted down a title for a post: “Mommy Needs Some Time Off.” Looking back now, I realize how tired I was—I barely managed to write the title before drifting off to sleep beside my laptop.
Flipping through my drafts, I couldn’t help but think how many parents would resonate with this feeling. How often do we find ourselves exhaling deeply after an exhausting episode with our toddler, perhaps triggered by something as trivial as a cup color, and whisper to ourselves, “Wow, I really need a breather before I lose it”?
However, as caregivers, true breaks are elusive. Those moments when we manage to put the kids to bed early just to squeeze in a few minutes of our favorite show? That’s not a break. And dropping the kids off at my sister’s house for a dinner date with my partner doesn’t quite count either.
There’s always that nagging voice in my head reminding me not to indulge too much on date night since I’ll be up at the crack of dawn to tend to the baby. Or the endless list of chores that loom over me—gathering tax documents or transferring laundry that’s been sitting too long.
When I imagine a break, I envision escaping my responsibilities entirely, even if just for a week. I dream of a time when I don’t have to think about cleaning, cooking, or dealing with the chaos of children’s needs, including those late-night accidents that require changing sheets. Even the thought of letting the dog out for the umpteenth time can feel overwhelming.
Let me be clear: I adore my children with all my heart. I would do anything for them. Yet, I often feel the need to justify my feelings, as I know people can be quick to judge.
I vividly recall the first time my husband and I managed to get away three months after our first son was born. We checked into our hotel room and laid in bed, enveloped by silence. It was pure bliss. However, it’s been far too long since we had a child-free getaway. While our family trips are wonderful, they also require a lot of energy and early mornings.
Don’t mistake my words—I cherish the moments with my kids, but I can’t even remember the last time I relaxed by the pool with a book, baby monitor in hand. My mind is always racing with worries: Are the kids alright? Did my son throw a tantrum for the babysitter? Is his medicine given on time?
Are all parents this way? I can’t be the only one feeling this way.
For just one week, I long to not wake up in the middle of the night worried about a whimper or cry. I want to take leisurely showers, enjoy quiet moments, and watch television sprawled out on a bed without interruptions. I dream of meals free from tiny hands grabbing at my plate. For a week, I want to avoid laundry, simply relax, and focus on self-care.
I want a week without changing diapers or cleaning up messes. I want conversations with my husband uninterrupted by little ones asking where their toys are.
I crave a break, and I don’t think it’s selfish. Every parent deserves time to recharge, to maintain sanity, and to come back refreshed.
This year, I’ve decided I will make time for a break. I will go away with my husband, indulge in long showers, read books, and enjoy quiet dinners at a table sans high chairs. I know I’ll miss those little hands after a day, but it will be worth it. I dedicate my life to raising my children, and sometimes, I need a moment away. Absence truly does make the heart grow fonder, doesn’t it?
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Summary
This article reflects on the challenges of finding a true break as a parent, sharing relatable experiences and the longing for uninterrupted time away from responsibilities. It emphasizes the importance of self-care for maintaining sanity and being a better parent.