Ah, summer break—the time when parents everywhere brace themselves for the onslaught of endless questions and requests. If you’re the person joyfully exclaiming, “Only five more days until school is out!” I’m afraid we can’t be friends anymore. Sure, we can grab a drink sometime, but I must unfriend you from my social circle.
Your excitement about long beach days, spontaneous family trips, and the freedom from rigid schedules is absolutely suffocating. It’s only been two hours since my kids wrapped up their school year, and I’m already eyeing my wine glass like it’s an oasis in a desert of chaos.
4:32 PM
“Mommy! How long is a garden stick? Is it the same as this tape measure?”
“Mommy! Look! I clipped this tape measure to my belt loop. Can you see it? You’re not looking. How can you say ‘I see’?”
“And Mommy, don’t tell Daddy when he comes home. I want to surprise him!”
Meanwhile, my youngest, fixated on a show titled “Cat with a Blog,” frequently takes a break to interrupt my thoughts.
4:35 PM
“Mommy, why are you writing about me?”
“Why did you put a question mark there?”
“Can you put more cereal in a bag for me?”
“I’m going to do my homework after the cereal. Oh, and can I have a drink?”
“Before you respond with something like ‘are your legs broken’ or ‘did you forget where the refrigerator is?’, it’s not funny. I’m in the middle of my show! So please, can you get me a drink?”
“Mommy, are you writing about me in your blog?”
Did I mention this chatterbox is almost eight years old? What was I thinking when I sent him to speech therapy at two and a half because he wasn’t speaking enough?
4:39 PM
He glances over at his older brother, who is lost in the magical world of his iPad (aka the best babysitter ever).
“What’s the score? What game are you playing? Can Daddy download that for me?”
The older sibling, now annoyed by the youngest’s measuring spree—yes, he’s measuring everything in the house, including his brother—chimes in.
“Stop! You’re being annoying!”
“Stop measuring my foot and my head!”
“Stop measuring Wilsey!”
“Stop!”
“I said STOP!”
“Mommy!”
“Mommy!”
“Momm..yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!”
So, to all of you who eagerly anticipate those long, leisurely summer days: Enjoy every moment. I may never fully understand your bliss, but I’ll be sending my eight-year-old your way so we can share a glass of wine together. As for me? I’ll be doing the happy dance come September.
For those seeking more insights on navigating summer, check out this related post on Cervical Insemination, which offers valuable perspectives. If you’re considering options for at-home insemination, Make A Mom is a reputable retailer of syringe kits that can help you on your journey. Additionally, WomensHealth.gov is an excellent resource for information on infertility and home insemination.
Summary:
This humorous reflection captures the often chaotic reality of summer break for parents. With constant interruptions and demands from kids, it’s a time that brings both joy and exhaustion. While some revel in the freedom of summer days, others yearn for the routine of the school year. Ultimately, it’s a shared experience that many parents can relate to as they navigate the ups and downs of family life.
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