I regret that I couldn’t attend your recent gathering; I was simply too exhausted and preferred the comfort of my home. Please know it’s nothing personal. It’s not you, and honestly, it’s not even truly me; it’s the little ones I brought into this world who now dictate my days.
Five years ago, I embraced motherhood, and since then, sleep has become a distant memory. My energy levels are perpetually low, and my ability to engage in coherent conversations has diminished significantly. If we’ve crossed paths recently, I apologize if I’ve repeated myself more than once—I’m often unsure what day it is and have forgotten how to socialize without discussing the latest episodes of children’s shows.
After welcoming my second child, life became a whirlwind of chaos—constant noise, endless questions, and an uncanny frequency of the word “butt” popping up in conversations. Oh, and the messiness of parenting—let’s not even get started on that.
So, back to my absence at your event: if I had a few hours to spare, I’d much rather immerse myself in a few cherished activities that revive my spirit. For instance, I’d relish the chance to:
- Hide away in my room with a gripping novel, some music, and a glass of wine.
- Enjoy a nap—oh, how I long for those peaceful moments!
- Treat myself to a hair or nail appointment, if only to remember what it’s like to have time for self-care.
- Go shopping—real shopping, at a mall, with real clothes on (okay, maybe just leggings).
- Indulge in takeout from my favorite Thai restaurant, savoring every bite while listening to music in my car.
- Experience a movie without interruptions, just focusing on the film for a few hours.
While I could list more, what truly occupies the bottom of my list is small talk with unfamiliar faces. It’s not your event; it’s simply my ongoing struggle with postpartum anxiety. Large gatherings in tight spaces can overwhelm me, leading to what I humorously refer to as “people sweats.” Anxiety triggers a cycle of discomfort that I find hard to escape.
You might wonder why I can’t just bring my kids along. If only you understood the added stress of managing a lively toddler in a crowd of new people! “Don’t worry, everyone! He only screams like this all the time.”
Again, I apologize for my absence, but perhaps you can be thankful I spared you the potential chaos of a toddler tantrum. Please bear with me; I’ll regain my energy for adult interactions soon. For now, I’m reserving my me-time because I need it just as much as I desire it. After all, “A happy mom is less likely to lose her mind.”
For more insights on parenthood and home insemination, you might find helpful information at Make a Mom, and check out Healthline for excellent resources on pregnancy. Also, take a look at this article from one of our other blog posts for more parenting perspectives: Intracervical Insemination.
In summary, while I regret missing your gathering, I assure you that self-care is a priority for me right now. I hope to reconnect soon, once I find my footing again.