By: Jamie Larson
Updated: Dec. 8, 2020
Originally Published: May 18, 2015
Recently, I came across an inspiring piece about two mothers who, frustrated by the limited options in girls’ clothing, launched a line featuring designs like rocket ships, trains, and dinosaurs—prints typically reserved for the boys’ section. This prompted me to reflect on an equally pressing issue.
While I wholeheartedly support the idea of girls embracing “boy” themes in their attire, I can’t help but wonder: what about the boys? What about those boys who want to wear “girl” designs, or choose to dress up as Elsa for Halloween instead of Olaf?
As a woman, I’m proud to champion women’s rights and gender equality. I believe in pursuing opportunities on equal footing with men, and I want the same for my three daughters. Yet, there’s an important conversation we’re missing here. Boys, too, deserve the freedom to express themselves without societal limitations.
If one of my daughters prefers pants over dresses, engages in sports rather than dance, or simply enjoys activities that aren’t traditionally “girly,” nobody blinks an eye. Her athleticism will be celebrated, her intelligence will be acknowledged, and her adventurous spirit will earn her praise. I can confidently post pictures of her muddy hands online, and the comments will be supportive and encouraging. But what if my son wants to wear a dress or a shirt with a unicorn? Suddenly, the narrative shifts.
As a mother of a young boy who wanted to dress as Elsa, I had to piece together a costume because no store offers a “Boy Elsa” option. I hesitated to let him wear it to preschool, worried about what other kids might say. My son adores My Little Pony, yet finding a My Little Pony t-shirt for him has been impossible. While I can easily choose superhero shirts for my daughters—often gender-neutral enough from the boys’ section—most designs for girls are laden with ruffles, pinks, and bows.
This presents a constant dilemma for me. Yes, purchasing a girl’s shirt might bring my son joy, but I’m concerned about potential teasing at school. My husband and I strive to encourage him to embrace his true self while simultaneously shielding him from negativity. I’ve witnessed how a few cruel remarks from peers can diminish one’s spirit, and I want to protect my son from that, even if it means being selective about his wardrobe choices.
So why aren’t we discussing this aspect of gender inequality? Why do we encourage girls to pursue their interests while overlooking boys? Why do well-meaning family and friends suggest steering our son toward more “masculine” interests instead of letting him be himself?
If my son enjoys things deemed “girly,” why should I discourage him? It’s disheartening to hear comments implying that he might be gay simply because of his interests. I care about his happiness, not his potential sexual orientation.
Let’s start a dialogue on this issue. It’s time to break the damaging stereotype that restricts boys to a narrow range of acceptable interests. Acceptance should be universal, extending beyond gender. This mama is ready for change.
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In summary, we must advocate for all children, regardless of gender, to freely explore their interests without the confines of societal expectations. Let’s foster an environment where boys can embrace everything from dinosaurs to dresses without fear of judgment.
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