The first time I hosted a Friendsgiving, I was a young newlywed, barely twenty, with cooking skills that barely extended beyond instant ramen. I had just moved three states away from my family, living in a small apartment near the Air Force base where my husband was stationed. As a military family, holidays often meant being separated from loved ones, and many of our friends were in similar situations. Instead of succumbing to loneliness, we decided to bring together those who were also away from home for a feast, ensuring that no one had to celebrate Thanksgiving alone.
I can’t recall all the dishes I prepared that day, but I vividly remember the horrifying moment I pulled a long, tube-like object from the turkey. In a panic, I called my mom to ask if I had just discovered the turkey’s penis. After a hearty laugh, she informed me it was the neck. It’s safe to say that the rest of the meal was likely just as disastrous, yet everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, with friends contributing frozen pies, bakery rolls, and inexpensive wine. We laughed, shared stories, and created memories — a perfect remedy for holiday blues.
The feeling of loneliness can intensify during holidays, especially Thanksgiving, which is so deeply rooted in family traditions. Unlike more casual celebrations like Halloween or St. Patrick’s Day, Thanksgiving emphasizes family gatherings, making it particularly tough for those unable to partake. This is where Friendsgiving comes into play: a celebration with friends who may also be missing out on their family traditions.
Sharing Thanksgiving with friends ensures a joyful atmosphere. With familiar faces around, you can avoid the potential awkwardness of a family-only gathering, where you might find yourself navigating the antics of a tipsy Uncle Bob or an overly opinionated cousin. Friends enrich the experience by bringing their own traditions and flavors to the table; at our gathering, it’s not unusual to see a generous serving of sushi nestled between the stuffing and sweet potato casserole.
Hosting a potluck-style Friendsgiving also alleviates the burden on the host, allowing more time to relax and enjoy the company. As a parent now, I cherish the lessons this tradition imparts to my children. It underscores the values of care, sharing, and inclusion — reminding us that no one should feel alone during the holidays.
Reflecting on how far I’ve come since that first Friendsgiving nearly two decades ago, I’m proud to say I’ve never served food poisoning and can now prepare a delicious turkey without the slightest concern over its anatomy. Yet, one constant remains: our Thanksgiving table is always diverse and welcoming to anyone who needs a place to celebrate. I hope my children carry on this tradition, embracing the spirit of togetherness as they grow and eventually host their own gatherings.
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Summary:
Friendsgiving is a heartfelt tradition that fosters connection among friends who may be away from family during the holidays. This celebration not only creates lasting memories but also instills important values of sharing and inclusion, particularly for children. As the author reflects on their journey from an inexperienced cook to a seasoned host, the essence of Friendsgiving remains unchanged: a welcoming table for all.