A simple outfit—a blue t-shirt and black leggings. That was the clothing I wore on the night I experienced sexual assault. It was 1990, and I was just 16 years old.
You might be curious about the details of my outfit. Were my leggings too tight? Was my shirt revealing? Did it have any suggestive phrases? But let me make it clear:
It doesn’t matter.
When discussing sexual assault, the singular question that should be prioritized is whether consent was given. Yet, the pervasive culture surrounding rape often shifts the focus to what the victim wore, drank, or did prior to the attack. This deflection is classic victim blaming and serves to excuse the actual perpetrator’s actions.
A powerful new exhibit at the University of Kansas, titled “What Were You Wearing?”, aims to dismantle the harmful myth that a victim’s clothing can incite sexual violence. This exhibition features 18 outfits worn by individuals during assaults, accompanied by narratives from each survivor.
The display, curated by the university’s Sexual Assault Prevention and Education Center, powerfully conveys that the attire of a sexual assault victim is irrelevant to the crime committed against them. A sundress. A pair of shorts. A child’s outfit. Each piece of clothing, regardless of how much skin it covers, tells the same story.
Victims who summon the courage to report their experiences are often met with the question, “What were you wearing?” This inquiry seems particularly aimed at women, as highlighted by a male participant in the exhibit who noted that no one had ever asked him about his clothing when he shared his story.
This kind of exhibit is crucial now more than ever, given that a person in the U.S. is sexually assaulted every 98 seconds, yet only one-third of these incidents are reported. The cycle of victim blaming begins when survivors are interrogated about their outfits, alcohol consumption, and sexual history, diverting attention away from the true offender: the rapist.
Survivors frequently start to doubt themselves, wondering, “Did I do something to bring this on?” This internal questioning breeds shame, which discourages countless victims from coming forward, allowing perpetrators to evade justice and perpetuating a culture that blames victims.
There are no conditions that justify sexual assault beyond the absence of consent. We cannot entertain discussions that scrutinize victims based on their attire or circumstances. The conversation should never be about what a victim was wearing; instead, it should focus on how we can support them.
The normalization of victim blaming is further exacerbated by public figures who perpetuate these narratives. For example, a well-known personality once claimed that a journalist couldn’t have been sexually assaulted because he didn’t find her attractive. Such statements reinforce the misguided belief that appearance can determine consent.
Even prominent figures, like Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders, have sadly suggested that women bear responsibility for their own assaults based on their clothing choices or state of intoxication. This perspective is a dangerous manifestation of rape culture. Sexual violence is not dictated by one’s wardrobe, alcohol consumption, or sexual history.
Ultimately, society must shift the conversation towards empathy and support. The only relevant question to ask a sexual assault victim is, “How can I assist you?” Inquiries about their clothing can be both damaging and ignorant. Exhibits like “What Were You Wearing?” are essential in challenging the narrative that victims are in any way culpable for their assaults. By eliminating blame and shame, we can empower survivors to seek justice and begin their healing journey without fear.
If you want to learn more about the topic, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination, or explore this guide from an authority on the subject. For additional insights, refer to our other blog post here.