Before I became a parent, I believed I had a firm grasp on what anxiety truly was. I associated it with that uneasy sensation before a significant college exam, the fluttering butterflies prior to a blind date, or the nauseating dread before an important job interview. I understood the heart-racing anxiety that accompanied waiting for medical test results. I thought I comprehended anxiety—its triggers, manifestations, and the relief that followed its departure.
Then I had a child, and everything changed. I quickly discovered that real anxiety is a constant companion in motherhood. It ebbs and flows like the changing seasons, varying in intensity and nature, but it never truly vanishes.
The anxiety of motherhood can strike suddenly and ferociously, akin to a winter storm or a Category 5 hurricane. At other times, it creeps in quietly, much like the first crisp autumn day that subtly hints at changing leaves. The moment we feel our baby’s first kick, anxiety firmly establishes its presence in our lives and rarely lets go.
Yet, akin to weathering a storm, we find ways to endure the seasons of motherhood anxiety. It’s the belief that we will emerge from these trying times—and the recognition that we have survived them before—that helps us face the next unpredictable phase.
I once thought I would be overwhelmed by anxiety during my first pregnancy, plagued by fears of stillbirths, prematurity, or health complications. But I persevered. When I became pregnant again and recognized that anxious period, I managed it better, armed with the experience of having faced it before.
I feared that the relentless anxiety of having a newborn would never subside. But it did, and with each subsequent child, I learned to handle my worries more effectively, seeking help sooner because I was familiar with that season.
The challenges of toddlerhood seemed insurmountable at times, yet I emerged on the other side, ready to tackle it again without the same level of dread. I worried that the monotony of the middle years would break me, with constant self-doubt about my parenting abilities hovering like a dark cloud. However, as those years passed, I found myself with remarkable adolescent children, and my fears began to diminish.
As my children entered their teenage years, I felt as though I was at my breaking point. The worries that accompany this stage are unlike any other, and there were days I longed for the simplicity of toddlerhood. Yet, watching my son head off to college, I realized I could release the fears that had consumed me throughout his teen years, allowing me to approach the next set of challenges with a fresh perspective.
As mothers, we will navigate nearly two decades of varying anxieties about our children—and even beyond, as we continue to worry about them as adults. Recognizing these feelings as mere seasons of motherhood allows us to understand that they are temporary challenges that all parents encounter.
The mantra “This too shall pass” has been a lifeline, preventing me from succumbing to a total mental breakdown and instead helping me stay afloat with the hope that another season awaits. With the support of fellow mothers who have walked this path before me, I have tackled even the most daunting seasons with newfound confidence.
Sometimes, simply acknowledging that the anxieties we experience are part of a “normal” motherhood journey can provide a sense of relief. If only we were more open about sharing our vulnerabilities, we could offer solace and understanding to other mothers feeling alone in their struggles.
If you’re finding it hard to manage your anxiety, even on a small scale, please consult your doctor or reach out to a mental health professional. This article is not intended as medical advice.
For more information on navigating motherhood and anxiety, check out this post on home insemination resources, as well as these insights into pregnancy from March of Dimes. Also, if you’re looking for a reliable resource on home insemination kits, visit Make a Mom.
Summary: Motherhood brings a fluctuating mix of anxiety that accompanies each stage of a child’s development. From pregnancy fears to the challenges of adolescence, recognizing these emotions as temporary seasons can help mothers cope. Sharing our experiences can create a supportive community, reminding us that we are not alone in our struggles.