It’s rare for a single sentence to shift my perspective instantly or alter how I engage with my family. However, one phrase did just that, and it wasn’t uttered by a celebrated philosopher or an esteemed child psychologist. Instead, it came straight from children themselves. This journey of being “Hands Free” has taught me that our kids truly know what’s essential in life.
The phrase that transformed my approach was this: “College athletes were asked what their parents said that made them feel great, amplifying their joy during and after a game. Their overwhelming response: ‘I love to watch you play.’”
This impactful sentence appeared at the start of an article called “What Makes a Nightmare Sports Parent and What Makes a Great One,” which compiled insights from over three decades by Bruce E. Brown and Rob Miller of Proactive Coaching LLC. I found myself repeatedly drawn back to that single phrase, “I love to watch you play,” reflecting on how often I had expressed this sentiment—or perhaps failed to.
After attending numerous swim meets, music recitals, and soccer games, I realized I had never explicitly told my kids, “I love to watch you play.” Instead, I often offered encouragement, lengthy feedback, and suggestions for improvement. While my intentions were never malicious, I began to wonder if my verbose praise sometimes implied they weren’t “good enough.”
Could I simply say, “I love to watch you play,” and leave it at that? Would my children be confused by my newfound brevity? The next day, I had a chance to find out. My 8-year-old daughter had a swim meet. When she hit the water, her grace and strength took my breath away. Tears welled up in my eyes—not because I expected a medal, but because I was so proud of her health and happiness.
After the meet, as I wrapped a towel around her, I looked into her eyes and said, “I love to watch you swim.” It wasn’t as wordy as I usually am, but it was enough. She leaned into me, and I could sense the relief wash over her: the pressure was off, and she simply felt loved.
A few days later, my 5-year-old had ukulele practice. It was a big moment for her; her instructor removed the colored stickers she had relied on for guidance. As she played with newfound confidence, I felt tears again. This time, it wasn’t about perfection but about her joy and freedom in expressing herself. After her lesson, I bent down and said, “I love to watch you play your ukulele.” Her radiant smile and tight embrace spoke volumes: she understood.
The effectiveness of this simple phrase encouraged me to extend it beyond my children. While volunteering, I observed my husband helping our daughter learn to roller skate. The sight stirred deep admiration within me. I realized I had never told him how much I appreciate the way he engages with our family. So, I decided to write him a note, keeping it straightforward: “I love watching you help our daughter learn to roller skate” and similar sentiments.
Letting someone know how much they mean to you can be incredibly powerful, especially when it comes from a place of genuine love. A simple acknowledgment like “I love to watch you play” can make a world of difference, not just for children but for everyone we treasure.
This sentiment resonates deeply with the importance of connection in parenting. If you’re looking for more insights on parenting and home insemination, check out this post on the significance of emotional support. For those considering home insemination, CryoBaby’s at-home insemination kit is a trusted resource. Additionally, the NICHD offers valuable information on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, the power of simplicity in expressing love and support cannot be overstated. A heartfelt statement can uplift and encourage the ones we cherish, creating a nurturing environment where they feel valued and understood.
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