In this article, I aim to shed light on the misconceptions surrounding autism and emphasize that it is not defined by a single appearance. Each individual on the autism spectrum experiences it differently, affecting their social interactions, worldviews, and sensory processing.
I have a diagnosis of Asperger’s syndrome, along with ADHD, which complicates my focus and behavior regulation. Despite this, I often encounter skepticism from others who say things like, “You don’t seem autistic,” or “I know someone who has Asperger’s, and you don’t match their profile.” Even after sharing my experiences, some people remain unconvinced due to their preconceived notions about what autism looks like.
When I inquired about what sets me apart from the autistic individuals they know, the response often centered around my appearance—specifically, that I wear makeup and occasionally dress up. This has led to a troubling trend where others dismiss their own experiences or diagnoses based on superficial observations.
I was diagnosed at the age of 20 after a childhood filled with challenges. I was slow to develop, walking and talking only before age three, and starting school at almost six. My struggles with reading, writing, and social interactions led teachers to suspect dyslexia, but they overlooked the possibility of autism. I was advised to join a social skills group, yet the signs were missed.
As a child, I struggled with concentration and often had to sit away from distractions. My experience in school was difficult; I attended an Irish school for four years without grasping the material, which prompted an exception from learning a foreign language. Friendship was rare, and I leaned heavily on my sister for social connections. Growing up, I faced bullying for my differences—being labeled as “odd” or “weird”—stemming from my inability to grasp social norms or interpret interactions correctly.
In the workplace, I frequently changed jobs, never lasting more than three months. Despite putting in long hours and performing my duties well, I was often let go due to perceived communication issues, awkward behavior, and lack of eye contact. One employer even suggested that customer service roles weren’t suitable for me due to my discomfort in face-to-face situations. This was a tough realization, but I am working on improving my social skills.
Academically, I barely scraped by. I was placed in a specialized program meant for students heading straight into the workforce, not for those aiming for college. Despite my efforts and receiving multiple awards for my determination, I often struggled with even basic subjects. It felt as though I was trapped in a cycle of underachievement until I finally understood that these challenges were tied to my autism. Now, as I enter my second year of university, I continue to face hurdles, but I’m learning to adapt with the right support, including the use of a special needs reader for exams.
Sensory processing also plays a significant role in my daily life. I can become overwhelmed by sounds or bright lights, leading to discomfort and irritability. I often wear earplugs to sleep, and if I find myself in a crowded or smelly environment, I might feel compelled to leave early.
Another aspect of autism is stimming, which I often do in private to self-soothe. For instance, I have a habit of rocking side to side when lying down—a behavior I’ve engaged in since infancy.
Individuals on the spectrum often develop special interests that they can discuss at length. Currently, my fascination lies with Steve Jobs and Apple, and while I may dominate conversations on these topics, it provides me comfort in social interactions. Next time you engage with someone on the spectrum, consider asking about their special interests to foster connection.
So, when you encounter someone who doesn’t seem to “look” autistic, remember that autism manifests in many different ways. Each person has their unique challenges and traits. Understanding these differences is crucial to fostering an inclusive community where everyone, diagnosed or not, is respected.
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Summary
This article explores the misconceptions about autism, emphasizing that it does not have a specific appearance. Through personal experiences, the author illustrates how autism can affect social interaction, sensory processing, and academic performance. The piece encourages a deeper understanding of autism’s diverse manifestations.