Every mom knows the chaos that precedes a family getaway. It’s a whirlwind of laundry, errands, pet care, planning for emergencies, packing, and cleaning. By the time everything is ready, the excitement for the vacation often diminishes because we know how family trips can go. But when the trip is just for Mom—leaving the kids and spouse behind—it’s an entirely different experience.
Taking a trip alone, even if it’s just for work in a less-than-exciting location, feels luxurious. Sure, the accommodations might be mediocre, but the absence of kids and a partner makes it feel like a mini-vacation. However, the preparation can be just as intense as if the whole family were going along. Instead of worrying about everyone else’s needs, we focus on ensuring our husbands have everything they need to manage while we’re away.
This means stocking the fridge, prepping freezer meals, and laying out clothes for the kids. We might even omit some of the playdates and outings from the calendar, fearing it might be overwhelming for him. But let’s take a moment to reflect—do men micromanage their partners when they’re away? Spoiler alert: they don’t.
My partner, Jack, travels frequently for work. His pre-departure checklist? Just one item: pack his bag. And that’s completely acceptable because I know how to run our household. He trusts my abilities, which is why he doesn’t stress about whether the laundry is done or the house is spotless before he leaves. Sure, it can be tough when he’s gone, but I’ve got it covered.
Moms should feel no guilt about leaving the house in a manageable state when heading out. If grocery shopping isn’t feasible before departure, all it takes is a list and a pen. Jack can handle it, and he’ll likely earn some praise for taking the kids along. Even if the kids FaceTime me in mismatched outfits, I know they’ll survive.
Now, here’s the deal: if you come back to a mess, that’s not acceptable. While it’s understandable that he might be tired, basic chores like loading the dishwasher or taking out the trash shouldn’t be daunting. It’s reasonable to expect a home that’s not in complete disarray after a few days away.
Remember, husbands are not babysitters; they are equal partners. They share in the responsibilities of the household and parenting. When we fail to recognize their capabilities, we weaken our partnership.
Recently, when I took a trip, I ensured Jack was aware of the week’s schedule, and then I let him take the reins. I didn’t fret about the details because I trust him to manage the household and the kids. He knows how to tackle tasks like cleaning up or planning meals.
Our partners shouldn’t feel overwhelmed by the lack of a detailed plan. They’re capable adults who can handle the responsibilities of home and children. If you think your husband wouldn’t manage without your constant guidance, it’s time to stop holding his hand. Let him figure it out—you might just be surprised at his ability to keep things afloat.
For more insights on this topic, check out our other blog posts where you can find useful information about family dynamics and responsibilities. If you’re interested in resources related to pregnancy and home insemination, visit the CDC for excellent guidance.
Summary
Moms often feel the need to overly prepare for their time away, but fathers are fully capable of managing the household and kids. By trusting their abilities, moms can enjoy their time off without guilt.