The debate on when to involve children in their own IEP meetings is a common one. My clear stance is: don’t wait until they’re 16 to include them.
Here’s the rationale: Our goal is to nurture children who will grow into self-sufficient adults. It’s crucial to prepare them to advocate for themselves in the future. Just as we wouldn’t expect a child to learn to tie their shoes or navigate public transport without guidance and practice, we must provide our kids with ample chances to observe us, their parents and educators, modeling effective advocacy skills.
By attending IEP meetings, children can:
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Learn the Language of Advocacy
Familiarizing them with terms related to their diagnosis, symptoms, necessary accommodations, and the vocabulary surrounding these topics is essential. If we expect them to manage their own cases eventually, they need to know the right words. Introducing this language early and frequently is key. But won’t they feel awkward or uncomfortable hearing us discuss their challenges? -
Normalize Their Needs
When certain topics are shrouded in secrecy, it often leads to feelings of shame. By including children in discussions about their needs, we teach them that needing support is a normal part of life. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses; shielding them from this reality may imply that their conditions, like autism or dyslexia, are somehow shameful. This belief can hinder their ability to live authentically and successfully. -
Practice Sharing Their Needs and Preferences
Once children understand their needs and possess the language to express them, attending IEP meetings provides a platform for practice. Advocacy is like a muscle—initially challenging, but it strengthens with use. Would we want their first experience asking for assistance to occur in a tense work environment? Certainly not! Starting early is crucial. -
Contribute Unique Perspectives
You might have heard the saying, “Nothing about us without us.” Just as we dislike being discussed without our input, so do our kids. By having them present at their meetings, we affirm that their voices are important. Moreover, kids often have insights into what helps them best. They might suggest ways to engage meaningfully in class or cope with anxiety in crowded settings. Involving them in the problem-solving process not only empowers them but also fosters an easier implementation of solutions.
So, what age is appropriate? The earlier, the better. Even young children can participate for a short duration—just ten minutes—to share their preferences and what aids them in school. Prepare them by discussing what an IEP meeting entails, its purpose, and what they might want to express. Consider assisting them in jotting down thoughts and questions ahead of time. Gradually increase their involvement over the years, ensuring they feel comfortable.
In conclusion, integrating your child into IEP meetings not only prepares them to self-advocate but also normalizes their experiences, allowing them to thrive in the future. For more resources on this topic, you can visit CCRM IVF’s blog or check out this article for further guidance on home insemination kits like CryoBaby’s combo kit.