The instant my three daughters were placed on my chest, a powerful urge to keep them close surged within me. Despite the aches and fatigue that often overwhelmed me, all I yearned for was to snuggle them tightly. There were days when the emotional weight of new motherhood brought me to tears, yet nothing could quell my desire for their gentle touch and the comforting weight of their small bodies in my arms.
When my eldest daughter arrived 15 years ago, practices like co-sleeping, feeding on demand, and holding the baby constantly were viewed as unconventional by previous generations. Initially, I too found it a bit odd, though it felt intrinsic to my parenting style. I instinctively held my baby when she cried and kept her close at night for feedings. Besides, it was simply more convenient to have her nestled against me rather than constantly putting her down and picking her back up. When I could no longer manage, my husband was always ready to step in, eager to bond with her.
Contrary to popular belief, showering a child with love—both physical and emotional—does not spoil them or create entitled behavior. We’re not indulging them when we hold them close, comfort them, or shower them with affection. During their early years, children need our warmth to feel safe, learn to sleep, and understand their place in our world. Keeping them close is a natural response for most new parents, enriching both the emotional bond and positively impacting brain development.
Recent studies reveal that hugging our children can even boost their intelligence. In research conducted by the Center for Perinatal Research at Nationwide Children’s Hospital in Columbus, Ohio, it was found that infants who experienced more physical affection showed enhanced brain responses. The study involved 125 babies, both preterm and full-term, demonstrating that positive interactions like breastfeeding and skin-to-skin contact resulted in stronger brain activity, while negative experiences led to diminished responses. Although premature infants had a lesser reaction to gentle touch compared to their full-term counterparts, increased holding improved their brain response.
So, how does this research link to increased cognitive abilities? Babies’ brains are still developing at birth, and positive experiences are crucial for their growth. Touch is their primary mode of experiencing the world, and cuddling, rocking, and hugging foster sensory development, which includes touch, pressure, and movement. A well-developed sensory system is foundational for successful cognitive, perceptual, and social development.
My youngest is now six, and thankfully, she still enjoys snuggling. I cherish moments spent wrapped up with her in bed or sitting on the kitchen floor with her in my lap while we cuddle with our dog. With a tween and a teen in the house, I know these moments won’t last forever, and I relish them.
I am the mom who will always seek a hug, even when faced with eye rolls from my older girls. They might feign disinterest in snuggles, but deep down, I know they appreciate it. After all, who doesn’t want a warm embrace?
I’ve made it clear to my daughters that I don’t intend to stop hugging them anytime soon. Plus, I’ve found some science that suggests my affection might even enhance their intelligence, even as they grow older. It was once believed that brain development ceased around the age of six, but recent studies indicate that another growth spurt occurs during puberty. This means I should embrace them even more to help them reach their full intellectual potential.
Parenting often requires us to navigate challenges without a clear playbook. We consult books, share insights with fellow moms, and scour the internet for guidance. Trusting our instincts is key, and research confirms you can’t love or hold your child too much. Affection isn’t merely about ensuring our kids feel loved and secure; it’s also about nurturing their brains to achieve their fullest potential.
So hold those babies close, and don’t let anyone sway your commitment to affection. For more on this topic, check out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination. And if you’re considering other methods, you can learn about an effective option at Make a Mom or explore our post on intracervical insemination.
Summary
The act of hugging and holding our children is essential not only for emotional bonding but also for cognitive development. Research shows that positive physical interactions can significantly enhance brain development in infants and children, making affection a crucial aspect of parenting. Trust your instincts and embrace those precious moments.