My friend, Sarah, a devoted mother of two in Utah, once thrived in the corporate world, but when she welcomed her son, she chose to trade business meetings for long afternoons filled with cuddles and park adventures. Just before her daughter arrived, she embarked on a new journey by launching her online store, Chic Boutique. Curious about her motivation, I asked her what sparked this venture, and her answer was more profound than I anticipated.
Sarah revealed that she had spent much of her life feeling uncomfortable with her reflection. Growing up in sunny Florida, wearing bathing suits was especially challenging, and the thought of shopping for clothes filled her with dread. Despite her love for fashion, she often defaulted to worn-out, stretchy pants. She battled intense emotional pain, attributing it to her appearance and believing that happiness was just out of reach if only her body were different. For years, she struggled with a severe eating disorder that dominated her life.
Sadly, Sarah’s experience is not unique. According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), 20 million women in the United States will encounter a clinically significant eating disorder at some point in their lives. Mirasol, a renowned eating disorder treatment center, notes that 1 in 200 American women suffers from anorexia, and 2-3 out of 100 face bulimia. Moreover, studies indicate that up to 10% of college women deal with a clinical or near-clinical eating disorder, including 5.1% diagnosed with bulimia nervosa.
Sarah shared the harsh realities of how she treated her body, allowing self-hatred to dictate her life choices. However, everything changed one afternoon while she was walking in her favorite park, seeking respite from her anxiety. As she felt the rhythm of her heartbeat and the strength in her legs, a revelation washed over her: her body had always been her ally.
In that moment, she was overwhelmed with gratitude and mentally expressed thanks to her body: “Thank you for carrying me through so much. Thank you for allowing me to walk, run, and experience life. Thank you for enduring my mistreatment and sticking with me through my darkest days.” She began to apologize for the harm she had inflicted on herself and continued to express her gratitude.
This moment was just the beginning. Three years later, after becoming a mother for the first time, she experienced another significant epiphany. She described the birth of her son as the most transformative experience of her life—after months filled with anticipation and discomfort, this precious being, created in her body, finally rested on her chest. Yet, amidst the joy, she felt the pressure to fit into her pre-baby jeans. A few days after giving birth, she felt compelled to bind her postpartum belly. But as she removed the girdle, she looked at herself with newfound pride and gratitude. “Thank you for giving me my son. Thank you for my chest, which now cradles him. Thank you for my arms, which hold him close. Thank you for my body, which nurtured him for so long.”
As her first year of motherhood unfolded, she emerged from the fog of sleepless nights and colicky days, catching a glimpse of her reflection—yogurt-stained yoga pants and messy hair. It prompted her to ponder where the ambitious woman she once was had gone. Though she cherished her time at home, she refused to let it overshadow her personal aspirations.
In this period of reflection, the word “merci” began to resonate with her, symbolizing the gratitude that had guided her healing journey. It became the driving force behind her decision to open Chic Boutique, where her passion for fashion would intertwine with a message of self-love and acceptance.
Sarah recognized that while the average American woman wears a size 14, many leading fashion brands do not cater to larger sizes. With Chic Boutique, she sought to change that narrative by curating styles that accommodate all sizes from 0 to 24. “I believe every woman should celebrate herself and say, ‘This is who I am,’” she stated. She learned that true self-worth stems from within, and it’s a powerful truth she wishes to share with others. “Self-love and acceptance are the foundations; they don’t come from a certain size or shape,” Sarah emphasized. “When women embrace themselves and feel confident in what they wear, fashion transforms from a source of anxiety to one of empowerment.”
Sarah recounts her experience of shopping at a plus-size store for the first time with her sister, who encouraged her to step out of her comfort zone. There, she discovered beautiful plus-size models and found a pair of jeans that made her feel confident. The compliments she received when wearing that outfit affirmed that her newfound love for what she wore radiated beauty. “Clothes don’t define us, but they can evoke powerful feelings,” she said. The feeling she wishes to promote is one of self-love.
Sarah’s message extends beyond just keeping personal ambitions alive amid motherhood; it’s about sharing the lessons learned from personal struggles. It’s about embracing and accepting oneself fully and transforming past demons into passions that can inspire and uplift others.
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In summary, Sarah’s journey from self-loathing to self-love illustrates how one woman’s struggles can become a source of inspiration for others. Her story serves as a reminder that embracing our true selves and sharing our experiences can create positive change in the world.