On a tranquil evening, six months before my wedding, my fiancé raised an eyebrow and asked, “If I ask nicely, will you show me what’s in your secret box?” I felt a wave of embarrassment wash over me. What lay within that box was a collection of my private financial missteps, and I hesitated, wondering if I could truly reveal my hidden struggles.
Slowly, I stood up from the table and walked to the bedroom. I retrieved a shoebox from under the bed, the container for my secrets that I had never shared with anyone. As I returned to the dining room, I opened it, and the contents spilled out in a chaotic mess—a collection of receipts and bills, alongside the thud of my checkbook.
At 23, I was a working adult with a decent salary, yet I was clueless about managing my finances. My approach to “banking” was to stuff everything into that box, only addressing it when the overdue notices arrived. I stopped spending when the ATM informed me I was out of funds. Cooking, parallel parking, and jump-starting a car were also skills I lacked. I had graduated with a nursing degree and could perform medical procedures in my sleep, but balancing a checkbook? That was an entirely different challenge.
It was a humbling experience. Fortunately, my fiancé, patient and understanding, guided me through the basics of finance. We spent countless hours together, working on my budgeting skills until I finally grasped the concept of a balanced checkbook. I felt inadequate, but my desire to learn and grow helped me forgive my initial ignorance. Over time, I improved my budgeting skills and eventually became quite adept in the kitchen.
The crux of my story? I was born in the late 1970s, rooted firmly in Generation X, and I was ill-prepared for adult responsibilities. My generation prides itself on being independent and self-sufficient, but we often forget that we, too, struggled when we first entered the workforce. We should refrain from criticizing millennials for seeming unprepared or lazy when we were equally lost.
Recently, two women from Maine ignited a discussion by founding The Adulting Academy, a program designed to support millennials grappling with adulthood’s challenges. They offer courses on vital topics like budgeting and insurance claims, attracting eager 20-somethings who are determined to gain independence but lack the necessary skills.
While some might argue that millennials are failing due to inadequate parental guidance, I disagree. Lacking knowledge about managing bills or debt does not equate to being incapable. I’m 42 and still struggle with modern technology like Snapchat. We are all in a constant state of learning. There’s no reason to disparage an entire generation simply because they approach life differently than we did in our prime.
Honestly, I would have eagerly enrolled in The Adulting Academy in my 20s to gain budgeting skills. It’s easy to mock millennials for seeking quick fixes or lacking essential job market skills, but transitioning into adulthood is daunting. Providing resources for young adults to thrive is valuable and necessary.
Here’s the truth: millennials are far more adept than we Gen Xers were. While we hid our failures, millennials openly acknowledge their struggles and actively seek assistance to improve. I admire their ability to establish a work-life balance that eluded me in my youth, and I envy their willingness to ask for help.
So, Gen X, let’s ease off on the criticism. Millennials are thriving; they don’t need our judgment. They’ve mastered parenting in the digital age and are tackling social issues with impressive fervor. We, as Gen Xers, could learn quite a bit from the younger generation. Personally, I’d love to have a millennial show me how to navigate Snapchat—no shame in that.
In summary, millennials are doing just fine, and it’s time for us to support rather than shame them. They’re embracing adulthood with openness and resourcefulness, and we should celebrate their efforts, not criticize them.
For more insights on navigating parenthood, check out excellent resources like March of Dimes and learn about useful tools such as the BabyMaker Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit for those considering home insemination options.