As a pediatrician, I find myself encountering parents of twins more frequently than ever. It seems like once you learn that you’re expecting twins, they pop up everywhere, even in places you’ve never seen them before. Many of the parents I speak with have older twins who can do things like dress themselves, help with chores, and even fetch the mail. They often share that raising twins gets increasingly enjoyable as the years go by.
However, it’s surprising to hear about the few who claim that parenting twins only becomes more challenging with age. I’ve never quite understood the purpose of sharing such a perspective. If you encounter someone with that viewpoint, it might be best to just smile and walk away, or perhaps dramatically exclaim, “I can’t do this!” and hope for a sympathetic ear nearby.
One experienced mom shared a great piece of advice: “People without twins often overthink how it’s done. You just do it! Maintain a sense of humor and take it one day—or even one hour—at a time.” You might hear the saying that “God never gives you more than you can handle,” to which you might feel like responding, “I think He’s mistaken me for someone else!” Then, in a twist of fate, the baby you’ve been wishing would sleep for even a few minutes finally does—giving you a moment of gratitude… and likely a nap of your own!
A good sense of humor is essential. If you don’t possess one yet, you’ll need to acquire it quickly. Life with twins often feels overwhelming, but laughter can transform stressful situations into manageable ones. Remember what Kurt Vonnegut said: “Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.”
For instance, take the case of Mark and his twin sons, Lucas and Noah. One particularly challenging night, they were in the midst of changing diapers and sheets at 3 a.m. when their toddler daughter barged in and promptly got sick all over freshly laundered clothes. Instead of despairing, they laughed—because what else could they do?
Now is the time to adjust your expectations. I recently learned that raising triplets can take an estimated 196 hours of effort each week—yet there are only 168 hours in a week! If you break it down, raising twins might consume around 130 hours weekly. This realization undoubtedly suggests significant lifestyle adjustments.
If you are someone who requires a spotless home at all times, consider creating a 12-step program to help you cope—unless, of course, you have a full-time housekeeper. I recall a moment when my partner, Jake, came home to find me exhausted and frazzled, and I snapped at him that money doesn’t grow on trees nor do housekeepers. He quickly grabbed the vacuum cleaner, perhaps out of fear!
You’ll also need to accept that gourmet meals may not be a daily occurrence unless you can hire a personal chef. Many nights, a bowl of cereal will feel like a feast. And holiday cards? Well, they might not go out until March—embrace the idea of sending your wishes via social media instead! As Jake often says, “There aren’t enough hours in the day or adults in this house!”
You may find yourself becoming surprisingly flexible. Parents who once prioritized tasks may find joy in watching a movie instead of cleaning. A diaper blowout before meeting Santa might force you to rethink your plans, but these moments can teach you about prioritizing what truly matters.
Expect that organization will soon become a part of your life, regardless of your pre-twins habits. If you were previously organized, you’ll likely elevate your skills even more.
When I was unexpectedly admitted to the hospital at 32 weeks, I had only a brief moment at home before giving birth to my twins, who spent 16 days in the NICU. That time allowed me to prepare, but the real learning comes from living the experience and figuring out what works best for you.
Above all, remember that you were given the blessing of twins because someone trusted you could handle the challenge. For more insights into the realities of parenting twins, check out our post on terms and conditions related to home insemination.
Summary:
Raising twins is a unique journey filled with challenges and joys. Embracing humor, adjusting your expectations, and finding flexibility in your routine are key. As you navigate this adventure, remember that support systems and resources like this fertility center can help. If you’re looking for more information on home insemination, Cryobaby’s at-home insemination kit can provide valuable insights.