On Valentine’s Day, my husband, Jake, reached out to me for the first time in years, but I was too busy enjoying a lavish dinner with my sisters at our mom’s place. As I savored steak and chocolate with my two single sisters, I missed his call.
Listening to his voicemail later that evening, I hardly recognized his voice. We had only met once, but the fact that he was curious about my plans warmed my heart. It was well past 10 PM, but I felt an urge to reconnect, so I dialed his number without hesitation. Our conversation lasted for hours, and we made plans to hang out two days later. I was excited, and sleep eluded me for two nights.
During our dating days, we always celebrated Valentine’s Day as our anniversary. It felt more special than merely acknowledging it two days later, and our love blossomed from that moment. After a whirlwind romance, we became exclusive after just three dates and fell deeply in love within a month. Family introductions followed soon after, and weekends morphed into cherished time spent together. Canoeing, fancy dinners, camping, and spontaneous adventures filled our early years, culminating in an engagement, a house purchase, and marriage.
Fast forward 17 years, and our relationship is hanging by a thread, teetering on the edge of divorce. Valentine’s Day has lost its magic in our marriage. What used to be a day filled with thoughtful surprises has dwindled down to hurried dinners and neglect—responsibility on both sides.
This year, we’ll be spending Valentine’s Day apart. But despite the circumstances surrounding my marriage, I refuse to succumb to sadness on this day dedicated to love. I’ve always cherished Valentine’s Day—not just for the romantic gestures but also for the sweet memories of childhood, crafting cards for classmates, and the special dinners my mom prepared even during her own tough times.
While I reminisce about the night Jake first called me, I also recognize the joy I felt that evening with my sisters. There’s a wealth of love in my life, particularly the love I have for myself. This year, I’m focusing on self-love and gratitude, which I need now more than ever.
Instead of wallowing in despair, I’m planning a fun evening with my children. We’ll indulge in Chinese food, and I’ll surprise them with little gifts wrapped in red tissue paper. I’ll even treat myself to flowers and chocolates—because why not? I deserve to celebrate love, even if it’s in a different form this year.
Valentine’s Day may not hold the same significance in my marriage, but it doesn’t diminish its value. There’s too much love in this world to let my circumstances dictate my happiness. For more information on navigating love and relationships, check out this excellent resource.
Summary:
Amidst the challenges of a marriage on the brink of divorce, the author embraces Valentine’s Day with self-love and positivity. Instead of mourning the relationship, she focuses on cherished memories and plans a joyful celebration with her children, reaffirming that love exists in many forms.