Please Stop Asking Me, “Do You Want More Kids?”

conception sperm and egglow cost IUI

In society, there’s a prevailing notion that after two or three children, parents should likely be done expanding their family. If someone has five or more, they’re often perceived as unconventional or downright eccentric. Rather than asking, “Are you finished?” the question shifts to, “Do you want more?!”

Honestly, I find this inquiry quite bothersome. It’s an odd question to begin with because a child isn’t like a new car or the latest gadget, where the implications for my life are solely considered. To imply that my desire for (or against) another child can be based on how it suits my life is rather strange.

Even if my partner and I felt entirely maxed out and incapable of managing another child, I would hesitate to say, “No, I don’t want more.” That kind of statement reduces children to mere inconveniences, trivializing their existence to fit our desires.

Yet, I understand what people are really asking. They’re not probing into the philosophical realm but rather inquiring if I’m ready to endure another round of sleepless nights and diaper changes. They want to know if I’m prepared for the daily sacrifices that come with parenting.

And the truth is, I’m not always up for it. Like most people, I can be lazy and a bit selfish. Whenever my partner and I contemplate any significant purchase or life change, my first thought is often, “Will this make my life more complicated?”

Yes, parenting comes with its share of tedious tasks and challenges — I won’t deny that. However, it’s essential to recognize that these demanding early years are fleeting. I won’t always be dealing with diapers or midnight wake-ups. Eventually, my children will grow up, and the most rewarding aspects of parenting will unfold as I watch them build their own lives.

Focusing solely on whether parents “want” more children overlooks the reality that kids aren’t children forever. They eventually grow into adults who will influence the lives of countless others. A child is not just mine; they will become future friends, coworkers, and even parents themselves. Isn’t that a significant consideration when deciding to welcome another human into the world? It puts the annoyances of the early years into a different perspective.

When faced with the question of wanting more kids, particularly from a stranger at the grocery store, I find it challenging to respond quickly. That person is likely searching for a straightforward “Yes, I’m open to a dozen kids” or “No way, I’m done” answer so he can continue with his errands. But the complexity of that question can’t be boiled down to a simple response.

Deep down, I will always have a desire for more children. I yearn to experience the joy of welcoming another unique little soul into our family, discovering a new dynamic that I never knew was missing. I also long for the fulfillment that comes with raising another child to navigate the world.

However, what I want is not always what’s best for our family. The decision hinges on what my partner and I feel we can realistically manage, as well as the needs of our existing children.

In light of this, it becomes clear that “Do you want more kids?” is just one of many questions to consider. For more insights on family planning and parenting, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination or visit this link for more information about home insemination options. Another authority on the subject is Cryobaby’s home intravaginal insemination syringe kit.

Summary:

The article discusses the societal pressure on parents regarding the number of children they have, particularly focusing on the frustration surrounding the question, “Do you want more kids?” It emphasizes the complexity of this decision, which is not just about personal desire but also about practical considerations for the family as a whole. The author reflects on the fleeting nature of early parenting challenges and the long-term joy of watching children grow into contributing adults.

intracervicalinsemination.org