After the little ones settle down for the night, it’s the rare moment we can truly connect. We fight off our fatigue, intertwining our fingers while we watch our favorite show. We find the energy for intimacy, even when exhaustion weighs us down. Each morning, he leans in for a kiss as he heads out the door to work, and throughout the day, we exchange messages filled with love — and sometimes frustration, when conversations are cut short by our busy lives.
As a mother who stays home with our children, I often feel swallowed up by this role. I adore being a mom, yet on certain days, it can be overwhelming. It’s a beautiful chaos, mirroring the complexities of my children — just like any relationship, it’s multifaceted. While this parenting journey is filled with joys I had long hoped for, it also brings unexpected challenges.
Yet, our marriage is very much alive, and our story continues to unfold. Yes, we have shared memories, like most couples do, but those moments often get buried beneath the daily grind of work, chores, and parenting duties. I yearn for a future where we can prioritize our connection before the day fades into night.
I understand that our children won’t be young forever, and I want to hold onto this fleeting moment in time where we are not only parents but partners in this journey together. I refuse to let our romance wait for a more convenient time. I don’t want to postpone our connection until the weekends or special occasions.
We strive to incorporate our “us” into the fabric of our busy lives — Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays — we’re determined to be the couple who fell in love amidst the chaos of daily life. However, the truth is that love and life transform when you’re navigating the demands of parenthood. Finding a babysitter is a challenge, and “date nights” are few and far between. Those precious hours we spend together before falling asleep can never replicate the leisurely mornings we once enjoyed.
I don’t wish for things to revert to how they were, but I do crave more of him and more of our shared moments. I try to savor that morning kiss, even as I juggle countless responsibilities. I strive to show our daughters a version of me that extends beyond just being their mom — a woman, a partner, and a friend.
I aim to share laughter during dinner preparations instead of letting small annoyances cloud our time together. I want to cherish every moment, even if they feel insufficient. I strive to communicate my love and the fact that I still need his affection. Though at times we feel like mere roommates, I want him to know that each day, I choose him.
Every kiss on the cheek as he rushes to work, every moment I stay awake instead of succumbing to sleep — these are all choices I make. Our loved ones deserve to hear our appreciation, especially amidst the daily complaints. They need to be reminded that we are here because we made that choice.
As our children grow and change, my husband and I find ourselves drawing closer, even without a little one standing between us. Every day brings new challenges and triumphs that shape our marriage.
This morning, I stood in the kitchen with our youngest, who proudly announced she was a “little big girl.” Her sister had just left for school, and her father was off to work. In that moment, I realized how quickly time passes — soon enough, she’ll transition from a “little big girl” to a fully grown “big girl.” It’s not a sad reality; it’s simply the nature of life — a cycle of growth and transformation.
My marriage is alive, continually evolving, and I’ve come to recognize its renewal. I just need to open my eyes wide enough to see it clearly. For those seeking more insights into family planning, you can explore this helpful resource on in vitro fertilisation or check out this article on the fertility journey for deeper understanding.
In the end, love is a choice we make every day, and I would choose him all over again.