Are your children misbehaving this holiday season? Finding yourself under scrutiny from friends and family while you just want to savor a glass of wine in peace? Worry not! I’ve compiled some clever excuses for those less-than-ideal antics.
- “I apologize for Charlie’s obsession with your cat’s tail. He’s experiencing a growth spurt, which makes him particularly ravenous.”
- “I can’t comprehend why Emma decided to show Great Grandma Linda her private parts. She’s recently learned about the differences between boys and girls, and perhaps she’s just expressing herself.”
- “I’m mortified that Liam was licking all the deviled eggs before placing them back on the tray. We’ve been teaching him the importance of exploring options, but it seems he missed the point!”
- “I’m sorry that Ava attempted to share her boogers with your son. We’ve been encouraging sharing, but I didn’t think it would extend to bodily functions!”
- “I assure you, Ethan didn’t mean to urinate on the cupcakes. His dad has been helping him practice using urinals, and I guess he’s still figuring out where to aim.”
- “I have no idea why Mia is running around the room and playfully nipping at people. She’s been watching too much Animal Planet with the babysitter. Someone will be having a chat about that, for sure!”
- “Rest assured, we don’t use bad language at home. I’m convinced that Noah picked up the phrase ‘Where on earth are my keys?’ from his schoolmates. Those kids can be a handful!”
- “I can’t believe Lily drew all over the dining room walls with lipstick. Her teacher has been encouraging her artistic expression, and I guess she took that to heart!”
- “I’m just as surprised as you are that Max wrapped up a fart for your daughter’s gift. This is definitely not something we joke about at home… ever!”
- “I’m not sure what’s possessed my kids to act like a pack of wild animals. It must be all that sugar my mother-in-law sneaks them when I’m not looking. It’s definitely the sugar and those in-laws—a dangerous combo!”
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In summary, the holiday season can bring out the best and worst in our little ones. With a good sense of humor and a few well-placed excuses, we can navigate the chaos with a smile!